Some people think success in life comes from hard work and determination. Others think money and appearance are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #success #life #work #determination #money #appearance

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Nowadays, the attainment of

success

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in life has become a hot topic of debate. While some

people

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perceive that wealth and physical appearance are essential to

success

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, others believe that devotion and diligence are critical to succeeding in life. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I shall discuss why extrinsic factors,

such

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as money and appearance, play a role in life achievement but why intrinsic factors, including determination and diligence, are more crucial. There are numerous compelling reasons why

people

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think money and outward looks are attributable to attaining accomplishments and the prominent one is that they enable

people

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to access a vast variety of social resources in an easy way.

As a result

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people

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with affluent backgrounds and attractive looks have more leverage to utilize in the process of pursuing

success

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For example

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, children from rich families can afford to attend classes like skiing and musical instruments from a young age, which are attributed to improving their comprehensive abilities. As can be seen,

people

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have good reasons to believe those extrinsic factors have a profound impact on achieving

success

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On the contrary

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, some oppose

this

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statement and say that hard work and devotion are more significant as those valuable characteristics assist us to overcome any hurdles on the way to

success

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For instance

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, a recent survey conducted in Japan suggested that assiduous and determined students can better withstand pressure and accomplish their goals in a competitive society.

Therefore

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, those core values are vital for us to attain achievements. To sum up,

people

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's opinions about attaining

success

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are various. Taking everything into consideration, I am inclined to believe that intrinsic values,

such

Linking Words

as diligence and determination, hold much more significance compared to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

external influences, including money and appearance.

Submitted by 1162242983 on Tue Jul 26 2022

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7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
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Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Some people think success in life comes from hard work and determination. Others think money and appearance are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?

There is a lot of pressure and stress in many people's lives. What are the causes of this problem? What could be done to reduce it?

In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast food. Many people think that it is good to eat traditional foods while others believe that fast food is a good choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries nowadays, more and more women have full-time jobs as men, so there is logic that men and women should share the housework tasks equally. To what extent do you agree or disagree?