Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achieving happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money. Do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion and examples.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Obesity - is one of the most common problems which is considered by people at any stage of life, especially in childhood. In terms of health and care costs, the population who have suffered from abnormal weight since childhood, experience issues in their adulthood. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will explore the key factors of

this

Linking Words

problem with potential solutions.

To begin

Linking Words

with, nowadays, children spend most of their time in

activities

Use synonyms

, which do not require any physical effort. Regular

activities

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as playing video games, watching TV Shows and spending considerable time on social media are causes storing the energy, which humans gain through a daily food intake.

For example

Linking Words

, on average, individuals need to take 1500 kcal daily in

order

Use synonyms

to maintain the body's temperature, blood circulation and brain activity.

However

Linking Words

, we do usually exceed

this

Linking Words

energy limit and need to do at least basic physical

activities

Use synonyms

, in

order

Use synonyms

to avoid obesity.

As a result

Linking Words

, the younger category of people, who have a sitting lifestyle steadily becoming more lazy and obese.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, with the growing of variety options for fast food around the world, consumers increasing in a linear proportion in which kids are taking a sufficient part of it. Based on health care researchers, intakes,

such

Linking Words

as burgers, hot dogs and sugar-based beverages consist of special additives, which

as a result

Linking Words

lead to addiction. Another influential aspect of their high demand in a global market is advertisements, which attract communities by their colour, motto and proper design.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

can be controlled and overcome by elders and more educative social workers in

order

Use synonyms

to reveal these marketing "tricks" and explain the side effects of

this

Linking Words

diet to the kids. In conclusion, the lack of physical

activities

Use synonyms

and a healthy diet might lead growing ones to irreversible consequences, not only in a fixed period of life but

also

Linking Words

in adulthood. Luckily, the world's significant population has learnt about these situations based on scientific proof and can take proper acts in

order

Use synonyms

to enlighten their families and people around them.

osamakhan7878Fri Jul 29 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

343 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people say that now is the best time in history to be living. What is your opinion about this? What other time in history would be interesting to live in?
Some individuals believe that nowadays is the best period of time to live on Earth, I agree with this claim to some extent, but if I had an opportunity to choose, I would like to live 500 years ago.
5
band
Difference between countries become less evident each year.Nowadays all the over world, people share the same fashions, advertising,brands,eating habits, Tv channels. Do the advantage of this trend outweigh the disadvantage.
The uniqueness of every countries in the world have been more replaced with globalisation. Having same inspiration on fashion, advertising, and every sectors in life from one country to other countries make it less interesting for tourists and lose its own styles. While, it is adaptale for people if they want to travel around the world, the disadvantages still outweigh the advantages in this issue.
7.5
band
In some countries, there is not enough recycling of waste materials (e.g. paper, glass and cans). What are the reasons and solutions?
Improving the recycling rate of waste materials has been a hot subject since the emergence of raw materials shortage at the beginning of this century. However, relevant efforts seem not to achieve the expected effects in many nations. It seems to me that the reason behind the issue is that we lack effective reward mechanisms.
4.5
band
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The map compares Grange Park in 1920 with the current time. Several features have moved, but a main change is the development of an amphitheatre, a water feature and the removal of the fountain.
6.5
band
he rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages.
Recently, social media has played a vital role in personal relationships as a method of communication due to its convenience and efficiency but it can have negative effects on human life such as addiction. This writer argues that social media’s advantages can exceed their drawback.

Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achieving happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money. Do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion and examples.

Some people say that now is the best time in history to be living. What is your opinion about this? What other time in history would be interesting to live in?

Difference between countries become less evident each year.Nowadays all the over world, people share the same fashions, advertising,brands,eating habits, Tv channels. Do the advantage of this trend outweigh the disadvantage.

In some countries, there is not enough recycling of waste materials (e.g. paper, glass and cans). What are the reasons and solutions?

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

he rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages.