Do children behave better when physically punished or rewarded. Do you agree or disagree.

Children are the future of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. Many people believe that they behave better when punished, whereas others contend that rewarding is the best way.

However

, I believe in the latter statement. The essay not only discusses explanations but

also

some relevant examples.

To begin

with, on the one hand, acknowledging their work may boost their confidence.

In other words

, when a child does a good thing, if we recognize

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

their work, they are motivated to do more of

such

a kind.

Moreover

, kids are attention-seekers, they actually

wants

Change the verb form

want

show examples

everybodys'

Change noun form

everybody's

show examples

attention, if we are attentive, they may do better tasks in order to grab the focus.

Furthermore

such

a thing may

also

inspire other kids to do the same.

For example

, my cousin's daughter, who is

5-years-old

Correct your spelling

5 years old

compete

Correct subject-verb agreement

competes

show examples

with her friends and

aspire

Correct subject-verb agreement

aspires

show examples

to do better, so that others appreciate her

instead

of her mates.

Hence

this

is their psychology.

On the other hand

, frequent assaults may lead to dangerous consequences, which

impacts

Correct subject-verb agreement

impact

show examples

the individual as well as society.Elaborating,punishments may cause

negative

Add an article

a negative

show examples

impact on their mentality. Young brains are not matured, so there may be chances of either becoming arrogant and violent, which

Correct your spelling

in turn affects

show examples

inturn

Correct your spelling

in turn

show examples

effects society or may get habituated to it and

doing

Wrong verb form

show examples

the same thing.

For instance

,I heard a piece of news about a

13 year old

Add a hyphen

13-year-old

show examples

, who turned criminal

Change preposition

after

show examples

facing similar situations within their family.

Therefore

this

should not be the case. To conclude, I do agree with the statement that children should be pampered rather than

hunting

Wrong verb form

hunted

show examples

. Because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it helps them to progress

Change preposition

show examples

their own,

in addition

this

aspires

Correct subject-verb agreement

aspire

show examples

others to be the same.

Submitted by mk.manasa26 on Fri Jul 29 2022

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Do children behave better when physically punished or rewarded. Do you agree or disagree.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?

In many countries, students take a year off finishing school should students take a gap year before attending university? What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both and give your opinion.