IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The gap between the rich and the poor is increasingly wide, as poor people become poorer and rich people become richer. What problems could this situations cause? what are the solutions to address those problems?

#gap #people #situations #address
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The problem of
poverty
Use synonyms
 has become more and more serious, whereas the group of wealthy
people
Use synonyms
 remains unaffected, which
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 the
wealth
Use synonyms
 gap
widened
Change the verb form
to widen
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, the potential problems are stemmed from
this
Linking Words
such
Linking Words
 as hate
crime
Use synonyms
 and classism will be addressed, and suggestions on how to tackle these problems will
also
Linking Words
 be delivered. As the friction between the
Use synonyms
wealth
Replace the word
wealthy
show examples
 and the poor
people
Use synonyms
increased
Wrong verb form
increases
show examples
, it could cause severe issues
such
Linking Words
 as
crime
Use synonyms
 related to classism, and the injustice caused by the long-term social confrontation. Classism is when
people
Use synonyms
 categorize and make
judgement
Add an article
a judgement
the judgement
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 individuals
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Use synonyms
society
Add an article
a society
show examples
 by one’s income. The
people
Use synonyms
 with higher salary seem to overlook those who are struggling in
poverty
Use synonyms
, and while in the reversed situation the poor
tends
Change the verb form
tend
show examples
 to hold hostility attitude toward the rich. So that the hate
crime
Use synonyms
 could arise.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 well-documented that the
people
Use synonyms
 who are economically weak are vulnerable to
change
Wrong verb form
changes
show examples
 made by public sectors,
such
Linking Words
 as the raising tax. As we can see that street
protest
Fix the agreement mistake
protests
show examples
 and
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
strike
Fix the agreement mistake
strikes
show examples
 in every country increase these years, causing the malfunctioning of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
 as well as
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 devastating influence on the economy. The solutions, that should be considered, are aid from the government and charity events held by private organizations.
First
Linking Words
 of all, the public sectors always have the most powerful administrative right to correct
such
Linking Words
 inequality.
For example
Linking Words
, the calculations of tax
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
show examples
 should put more
emphasize
Replace the word
emphasis
show examples
 on income levels. Families with high annual incomes have more responsibility
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 tax paying.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
charity events can
also
Linking Words
 evoke public awareness
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 those who are suffered from
poverty
Use synonyms
. By making
Add an article
a donation
show examples
donation
Fix the agreement mistake
donations
show examples
 to these
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
, the
poverty
Use synonyms
 problems and the
society
Use synonyms
 confrontation will definitely be improved sooner or later. To sum up, it is obvious that the gap between poor and
Use synonyms
wealth
Replace the word
wealthy
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 getting larger. Frequent occurrence of hate
crime
Use synonyms
 and street protest seems to become normal. In order to create a
harmony
Replace the word
harmonious
show examples
society
Use synonyms
 and eliminate the gap between poor and
Use synonyms
wealth
Replace the word
wealthy
show examples
, immediate actions should be taken before the situation get worsen.
Submitted by sfwin100 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: