young people are often influenced by their behaviors and situations by others in the same age. This is called peer pressure. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?
It is true that peer pressure has become common among teenagers impacting their
life
in different ways. Though in general, it has both positives and negatives, in my opinion, the benefits of Fix the agreement mistake
lives
influence
by Use synonyms
peers
are more than the drawbacks.
Those Use synonyms
that
argue the disadvantages of Correct pronoun usage
who
having
influenced by Verb problem
being
peers
point to the possibility of bad habits that can be formed Use synonyms
from
Change preposition
by
peers
. Young Use synonyms
people
can easily learn dangerous Use synonyms
skills
from the others in their circle. Use synonyms
For example
, if one smokes, it can easily affect Linking Words
the
other friends, who were not used to Correct article usage
apply
this
habit before. Linking Words
While
there is always a chance of negative Linking Words
influence
from Use synonyms
peers
, parents can Use synonyms
influence
their younger ones to choose their friends carefully to prevent them from getting into a trap of dangerous habits in their Use synonyms
life
.
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
However
, I would argue that there are more advantages Linking Words
of
having Change preposition
to
a
good friendsCorrect article usage
apply
circle
. Verb problem
apply
Firstly
, young Linking Words
people
can learn a variety of Use synonyms
skills
from the others in their group. Use synonyms
For instance
, communication and language Linking Words
skills
are improved by exchanging ideas with a diverse set of Use synonyms
peers
. Though there is plenty of information available on the internet, it can be accessed faster with the help of fellow groups as they can guide and point to the appropriate information. Use synonyms
Secondly
, there is a clear advantage of competitive spirit developed between Linking Words
peers
of the same age. They can pick up activities from each other to prove their abilities and improve their Use synonyms
skills
. Use synonyms
For example
, someone developing code to write a game can inspire others Linking Words
Linking Words
also
to improve their coding Rephrase
apply
skills
by developing similar or different games.
In conclusion, I argue that a healthy competitive spirit and an opportunity to learn from Use synonyms
peers
of the same age are more Use synonyms
when
young Correct word choice
important when
people
are surrounded by the right set of Use synonyms
people
who can positively Use synonyms
influence
them. Use synonyms
While
I acknowledge that there are some negatives of getting into a net of bad influences, Linking Words
this
can be solved by the guidance of parents.Linking Words
Submitted by nkamatam on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay could be a bit improved. Make sure your arguments clearly support your main points. Also, be careful with the clarity of expressions. For example, 'Young people can easily learn dangerous skills from the others in their circle.' It would be better to be specific about what dangerous skills you're referring to.
task achievement
Your task completion is generally good, but there are still some areas that need improvement. Be sure to completely respond to all aspects of the task. At times, the focus drifts slightly from the explicit task of discussing whether advantages outweigh disadvantages onto more general discussion on peer influence.