the diagrams below show the riverpark area of 20 years ago and the riverpark area now

#diagrams #show #riverpark #area #years

The map

illustrate

Change the verb form

illustrates

show examples

the number of development taking place in a

riverpark

Correct your spelling

river park

area between 20 years ago and

present

Correct article usage

the present

show examples

day.

To begin

with, there was

curved

Correct article usage

a curved

show examples

estuary

road

to the north, which can

merge

Wrong verb form

merged

show examples

sea and river. On the south of an

estuaru

Correct your spelling

estuary

road

there were petrol

station

, library and doctor's surgery located and surrounding

this

a u-shaped sun

road

was there.

Further more

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

show examples

, on the east side of the estuary

road

Add a comma

,road

show examples

there was a collage. On the opposite websites factory and shops were

also

there. On the both right and left sides of Sun

Road

a small Woodland where there.

However

Change preposition

show examples

Add an article

the present

show examples

present day

Add a hyphen

present-day

show examples

sea

Correct your spelling

seaside

show examples

side

Add a comma

,side

show examples

a Marine developed. The petrol

station

and factory

now

Add a missing verb

are now

show examples

converted into

post

Correct article usage

a post

show examples

office and supermarket respectively. The president

road

also

Add a missing verb

was also

show examples

built in

supermarket

Correct article usage

the supermarket

show examples

area on son

road

. At

present day

Add a hyphen

present-day

show examples

college is expanded and shops double than previous and

also

a bird house established on side of Woodland.

Moreover

Add a comma

,Moreover

show examples

the railway

station

bhid

Correct your spelling

left

Correct article usage

the left

show examples

of sunset street.

Overall

it is clear that

the most noticeable change that occurred in

Correct article usage

the riverpark

show examples

riverpark

Correct your spelling

river park

area

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

marina

Correct article usage

the marina

show examples

and railway

station

In addition

, the library and doctor's surgery

witness

Wrong verb form

witnessed

show examples

no changes in their position.

Submitted by s.singh7382 on Tue Aug 02 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words road, station with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "present" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

199 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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the diagrams below show the riverpark area of 20 years ago and the riverpark area now

Some people think that public health is the responsibility of the government, while others think that people should be responsible for their own health. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

LEARNING TO MANAGE MONEY IS ONE OF THE KEY ASPECTS OF ADULT LIFE. HOW IN YOUR VIEW CAN INDIVIDUALS BEST LEARN TO MANAGE THEIR MONEY

Many schools these days have problems with poor student behavior. Why do you think these problems occur? What could be done to tackle these problems?

In the future, it seems more difficult to live on Earth. Some people think more money should be spent on researching another planet to live, such as Mars. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.