Adverting discourage people from being different individuals by making them look the same.Do you agree or disagree?

Advertising is one of the terrific

invention

Change to a plural noun

inventions

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

the present age.

Individuals

Use synonyms

always find their uniqueness in advertisements and define their identity.Rather than preventing

people

Use synonyms

from being different

individuals

Use synonyms

, it allows

people

Use synonyms

receiving

Change the verb form

to receive

show examples

all sorts of

choice

Fix the agreement mistake

choices

show examples

and

building

Wrong verb form

build

show examples

divergent

individuals

Use synonyms

so that they can avoid being made look the same. The

first

Linking Words

point to make is that advertising has

change

Wrong verb form

changed

show examples

people

Use synonyms

life

Replace the word

lives

show examples

through

Change preposition

show examples

expending The shopping option.

Add an article

The consumer

show examples

Consumer

Fix the agreement mistake

Consumers

show examples

will not be limited to a product,as well as being effectively offered materials price and advantages,

therefore

Linking Words

helping us to get the most suitable product.

For example

Linking Words

,potential consumers are able to comprehend lots of information about the headset

such

Linking Words

as tone quality,battery life and something like that by comparing kinds of advertising.According to

this

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

are more likely to make deliberate decisions before buying the headset .If there are without advertising,

people

Use synonyms

may make a hasty decision. The

second

Linking Words

argument concerns individualism.Now more and more young

people

Use synonyms

have unique ideas.

For instance

Linking Words

,some

people

Use synonyms

prefer buying some products which are not common on the road to show their distinctive taste.It means it is difficult to make everyone buy the same product.Faced with

this

Linking Words

trend ,some advertisements have reinvented themselves as trendsetters selling niche products to

small

Add an article

a small

show examples

targeted

group

Fix the agreement mistake

groups

show examples

Such

Linking Words

advertising makes

people

Use synonyms

more personalized and distinguished rather than coordinated

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because its goal is to create deviance rather than unity. To sum up,given the nature of

Add an article

the advertisement

show examples

and a growing public awareness of individualism ,advertising can do little to create uniformity.Rather,it keeps

people

Use synonyms

well-informed,making it possible for them to become different

individuals

Use synonyms

yuanuf

Aug 5, 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

interconnected
globalization
remote work
independence
dependency
specialization
professional services
social validation
individualism
self-reliance
collective action
sustainability
global community
navigating
complexity
environmental movement

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Adverting discourage people from being different individuals by making them look the same.Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that watching sports in one's free time is just waste of time. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that it’s a good to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

smoking is a major source of serious illness and death throughout the world today.In the interest of public health ,government should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products .Do you agree or disagree

In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience. Discuss both views and give your opinion.