‘Failure is proof that the desire wasn’t strong enough’ To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There are a lot of idioms and
slangs
Fix the agreement mistake
slang
show examples
illustrate
Correct pronoun usage
that illustrate
show examples
the relevance between desire and
success
. If you don'
t
obtain something you
eager
Add a missing verb
are eager
show examples
to, it means that your desire doesn'
t
strong enough. In my opinion, I incompletely agree with
this
point of view because sometimes we had tried our best to achieve something we
eager
Add a missing verb
are eager
show examples
to,
however
, we still fail to make it due to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bad luck and external factors.
Furthermore
, enough resources for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals to pursue their dream is vital. If someone in poverty would merely
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
resources, it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
easily increase the difficulty to make it.
As a result
, I
am not totally agree
Change the verb form
do not totally agree
show examples
with the point
combining
Change preposition
about combining
show examples
desire and
success
,
in other words
, we can'
t
ignore the impact of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
external factors, like different backgrounds and luck.
Nevertheless
, I
am partly agree
Change the verb form
partly agree
show examples
with the relationship
with
Change preposition
between
show examples
hardworking and
success
.
Although
the
success
or
failure
would be influenced by some uncontrollable reasons, we can'
t
totally blame the
failure
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
those reasons. If we don'
t
spend enough time to sharpen our skills or absorb lots of knowledge as possible
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
we can, it is necessary to partly responsible for the
failure
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ourselves. We can'
t
deny that the external factors might be the key to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
failure
,
however
, the condition happened only
dominate
Correct subject-verb agreement
dominates
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
small part of our life. As a consequence, it is essential for us to work hard and achieve our dream as
possible
Correct quantifier usage
much possible
show examples
as we can. Even if we fail to achieve, we still do our best to finish the whole process. Sometimes, the process would be more important than the result.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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