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Band 4.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neighbourhood #sports #children
Some people believe that unpaid community
service
 should be compulsorily incorporated
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 secondary education programs.In my opinion,
this
 is an unwise proposal, which carries a lot of serious consequences
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and
citizens
Correct pronoun usage
its citizens
show examples
.
Therefore
, I do not agree with
this
 view. Community services play a major role in integrating different layers of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. It helps in the development of daily activities and because of
this
reason
Add a comma
,reason
show examples
 it should be carried out by qualified persons. Forcing students to be involved in these activities without their permission and willingness will result in a drop in the quality of these activities.
For instance
, if we forced a talented young musician to provide a
service
 in a rehabilitation house for seniors,
this
 will affect his musical skills enormously. Actually,
this
 proposal reminds me of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
forced labour during the forties of the
last
 century, when Germans used individuals from occupied territories to work in their factories. It is inhuman to dictate what people can or cannot do. As we know, students in high schools have a lot of financial burdens.
For example
, they have to pay their tuition fee. These factors will make it hard for them and their parents to accept the suggested plan. In conclusion, community
service
 should be a voluntary duty left
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 qualified persons, who intend to do it. Poor students should be paid to offer
such
Correct article usage
a service
show examples
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
 so that they can overcome their financial difficulties.
Submitted by Toni R on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • compulsory
  • high school programmes
  • unpaid community service
  • charity
  • improving the neighbourhood
  • teaching sports
  • sense of responsibility
  • empathy
  • broader perspective
  • societal issues
  • college applications
  • job applications
  • positive impact
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