Some people believe that the best way to improve the quality of healthcare in a country is to train and hire more doctors and nurses. Do you agree or disagree?

In some people's opinion, to increase the
quality
of healthcare, we need to have more medical
staff
with high
quality
who is trained professional. I agree
Correct your spelling
partially
partialy
Correct your spelling
partially
with that idea
Correct your spelling
because
beause
Correct your spelling
because
some reasons follow: First of all, medical
staff
who is working in
medical
Correct article usage
a medical
show examples
inviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
environments
, direct treatment for the patients,
their
Correct word choice
and their
show examples
professional
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
will impact the
patient
's
outcome
. If they have high qualifications, the
patient
's
outcome
will be good. If their skill is low, the treatment result of the
patient
is low. Even they can cause unwanted complications for the patients.
A
Correct article usage
The
show examples
medical
staff
was
good
Change the adjective
well
show examples
trained, they will be
empathize
Wrong verb form
empathised
show examples
with the patients. So
doctors
and
nurse
Fix the agreement mistake
nurses
show examples
need to update their knowledge usually and
continously
Correct your spelling
continuously
. With
this
aspect, I agree with
above
Add an article
the above
show examples
opinion.
However
, the
quality
of medical
staff
don't
Change the verb form
doesn't
show examples
decide everything for
outcome
Add an article
the outcome
show examples
of the
patient
. You know, outside of
Correct article usage
the skill
show examples
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
of
doctors
and
nurse
Fix the agreement mistake
nurses
show examples
, we need
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
more
Add a missing verb
have more
show examples
good
equitments
Correct your spelling
equipment
to reach high
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
patient's
Change noun form
patient
show examples
outcome
Fix the agreement mistake
outcomes
show examples
. The people with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high
quality
but
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have to work with
unfashionable
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the unfashionable
show examples
facility, they can not take a satisfactory diagnosis and appropriate treatment for the
patient
. Currently,
doctors
will not
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
to disease diagnosis require at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
very early stage without
mordern
Correct your spelling
modern
equiments
Correct your spelling
equipment
requirements
. With developing
social
Replace the word
society
show examples
, the disease is diagnosed at the cell level or molecular level. So fashion facility is
emmergency
Correct your spelling
emergency
require.
Conclusion
Change preposition
In conclusion
show examples
, with
above
Correct article usage
the above
show examples
causes, I
partialy
Correct your spelling
partially
agree with
opinion
Add an article
the opinion
show examples
that training and
hire
Wrong verb form
hiring
show examples
more
doctors
and nurses to improve the
quality
of healthcare.
Submitted by Andy on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • patient-to-caregiver ratio
  • continuous professional development
  • preventative healthcare
  • health education
  • holistic care
  • integrative care
  • international healthcare organizations
  • healthcare talent retention
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • underserved areas
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