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Band 3.5

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. discuss post this views and give your own opinion.

#countries #people #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport #post
Currently, many believe that it is necessary to spend loads of money in order to establish new railway
lines
 for super fast trains among cities while others think making improvements
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
existing
Add an article
the existing
show examples
 public
transport
 system is much more important. in the following
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
both issues and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will mention my opinion. On the one
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 there is no
deny
Change the form of the verb
denying
show examples
 that constructing new
lines
 for fast trains can be extremely beneficial for
transportation
Correct article usage
the transportation
show examples
 of goods between cities and
also
 for those who travel among Cities a lot because they can go
further
 distances in
Correct article usage
a
show examples
shorter time.
for
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 once I was in Pavia and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 wanted to go to Milan. by using fast trains it just took me 10 minutes to get to Milan.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 constructing these
lines
 are so expensive and
buy
Correct your spelling
by
show examples
 spending the same amount of money
government
 can make lots of renovations
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
existing
Add an article
the existing
show examples
 public
transport
 system.
Moreover
, improving
exist
Change the form of the verb
existing
show examples
transport
 system is more profitable for
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 because
cost
Add an article
the cost
show examples
 of using exit
transport
 is higher and
also
 by exporting goods to other countries
government
 can earn a lot. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 constructing railway
lines
 and improving existing public
transport
 are both equally important and in my
Correct your spelling
opinion
opinien
Correct your spelling
opinion
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should spend the same amount of money on both of them.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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