Some people spend a lot of money celebrating personal family events, such as weddings and birthdays. How important is it to celebrate such events? Do you think people spend too much money on these events?

#people #money #events #weddings #birthdays

In today's contemporary era spending capacities of the general public have increased significantly.

As a result

, on celebratory occasions like birthdays and weddings,

people

tend to spend huge amounts to show off in front of their near and dear ones and make that event memorable. In my opinion, it is vital to celebrate these important occasions as it makes an individual feel

recoganised

Correct your spelling

recognised

recognized

on his special day and creates an important memory.

Moreover

, I feel society members do overspend during

such

celebrations, and that money could rather be spent judiciously on a noble cause.

Firstly

, the

people

of the community love following the prevalent trend.

Therefore

, they try and mimic their friends and relatives who probably would have spent an immense amount on a recent celebration.

Moreover

, celebrating a birthday or an anniversary has

also

become a social ritual, which makes it increasingly important for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

community members to celebrate.

For instance

, it is very

rife

Correct word choice

common

show examples

these days to find

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

photos uploaded by social media users of their birthday celebrations on Facebook.

Besides

such

moments

also

create memories and make that person happy.

Hence

, it is apparent why

people

Verb problem

apply

show examples

consider these events special. Undoubtedly, with a rise in financial abilities, families waste a colossal amount of funds

while

organising

such

events, which is mostly because they want to showcase themselves in front of society.

Consequently

, a great sum is wasted on a big scale, which

otherwise

could have been used as an aid for the needy.

For example

, numerous

people

nowadays, donate some money to NGOs on their birthdays rather than wasting it on parties.

To sum up

, one can conclude that

rich

Correct article usage

a rich

show examples

community does spend a humongous amount on family events as it is considered important to celebrate and make them unforgettable.

Furthermore

, trends that are prevalent in society are copied by most

people

this

social modern world.

Submitted by abhaygill003 on Sun Aug 14 2022

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task response

Provide a clear opinion on the importance of celebrating personal family events and the issue of overspending. Also, provide a recommendation on whether people spend too much money on these events.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas. Use transition words and cohesive devices to improve coherence and cohesion.

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16Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people spend a lot of money celebrating personal family events, such as weddings and birthdays. How important is it to celebrate such events? Do you think people spend too much money on these events?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advatnages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In many cities, an increasing number of people do not know their neighbors and the sense of community is lost. Discuss the causes and give measures to turn it around.

Some peoole think that cities are the best place to live. Others prefer to live in countryside. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

(QG) In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?