Some people think children should have the freedom to make mistakes, while other people believe that adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
In our modern society, taking care of our
children
is one of the major challenges for adults, with people having different views about children
making mistakes
. While
there are some good arguments in favour of giving freedom for children
to make mistakes
, I believe that it is better for parents to prevent youngsters from making mistakes
.
On the one hand, there are parents who, in nurturing their youngsters, give them the freedom to make mistakes
. However
, there are certain negative impacts if they give too much space for their children
in daily activities. the children
may be prone to commit acts of violence,
because they do not know the difference between right and wrong. In my personal experience, my friend who grew up in a family that gives too much freedom committed some crimes when they were growing up as adolescents, Remove the comma
apply
such
as consuming drugs and gambling.
On the other hand
, I believe that preventing children
from making mistakes
is their parents’ task. This
parenting style makes the children
aware of the rules in their activities. Furthermore
, it is considered to be safer for adults, youngsters, and their friends. For example
, my neighbour who has two children
who are controlled from making mistakes
is always proud of them because of their good attitude and achievements at school.
In conclusion, I believe that parents have a responsibility to take care of and prevent their children
from making mistakes
because it has a beneficial impact on their personal development and their future.Submitted by serlyayus on
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task response
Develop a more balanced view by discussing the potential benefits of allowing children to make mistakes while acknowledging the need for guidance. Introduce and conclude the essay more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas and use transition words to enhance coherence between paragraphs. Ensure that each paragraph relates to the main topic and thesis.