A large company in your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. It has asked for feedback from the general public. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: - describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team - summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts - say how you think the company should spend some mone

#company #area #amount #money #sponsor #children #sports #team #two #years #concerts #feedback #summarise #mone

Dear Sir/Madam, I am excited to know about your's sponsoring of our community. As you mentioned, I would like to inform you that our kids are very poor at

sports

despite the biggest ground in the town.

Hence

, If you can sponsor the team in the

two years and they may perform in a phenomenal way all the way.

In addition

, everyone will get motivated toward

sports

eventually, and their physical fitness will be increased which is a good sign for our society.

On the other hand

, concerts will bring everyone together regardless of status and region.

However

, I strongly believe that

this

would be a fun event for all of us.

Furthermore

, these events will encourage new talent and create a well-established platform to showcase their mind-blowing skills along with mesmerizing dances too. As you know,

Sports

will be provided incalculable strength to our

generations which is much needed by all of us.

Hence

, Undoubtedly, we need to think of

sports

and basic facilities which bring swift growth in their career.

On the other hand

, these things may play a big role throughout their life. I would really appreciate it if you could consider sponsoring the

sports

event. I look forward to hearing a response with good news soon. Hope it will come soon. Best Regards, Lakshmi.

Submitted by lakshma999 on Tue Aug 16 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

220 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with is opinion. What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviours to children?
In the modern era, there has been a long-standing debate about whether a handful of the public assumes that celebrities should be role models for young multitude while others believe that parents and teachers should be role models for youngsters. In my perspective, parents and teachers should be role models for kids because moppet first follow them thus it is a good argument and both sides have a good advantage hence I will discuss both side's advantages
5
band
Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
4.5
band
Some people say that the experiences a child has before starting school have the most influence on their future life. Others say that experiences as a teenager, especially at school, are more influential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?
Some say that pre-school experiences is the most influential on a child's future while others argue that experiences as a teenager are more important. While the a human's talents and abilities are mostly discovered during the first 5 years, I personally believe that the years between 13-19 years have a more profound impact on our lives because of the career choice that we make in this time.
6
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is believed by many that work masters should serve where they trained while others consider every professional must be free to choose where to belong. Even though staying in the homeland leads to economic impact, migration might be better for the global experience.
<4
band
Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
Presently, it is much easier to work from distance owing to the advancements achieved in technology and transportation. It is my contention that this flexibility furnishes individuals with numerous opportunities both in professional and personal life, resulting in significant benefits.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the experiences a child has before starting school have the most influence on their future life. Others say that experiences as a teenager, especially at school, are more influential. Discuss both views and give your own opinion?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?