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Band 4.5

Young people these days tend to be less polite and respectful than in the past.what are the caurses and solutions of this problem

#people #caurses
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Nowadays ,
young
Add an article
the young
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 generation
are
Change the verb form
is
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 going
in
Change preposition
into
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 the dark side and
also
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 they lost their diamond as a culture .
In addition
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, they become
aggressive
Add an article
an aggressive
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 and disrespectful person so
that
Correct word choice
apply
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this
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 essay illustrates so
this
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 problem and give some useful solution.
First
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 of all, the main reason is that technology because they
uses
Change the verb form
use
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such
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 kind of activity which do not give knowledge and information
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for
Add the comma(s)
,for
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 example, today's generation
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 wasting their golden time on the devices and
also
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 uses some dark website
that is
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 help them to make
person
Add an article
a person
the person
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 into the devil
Add the comma(s)
, as a result,
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as a result
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 they are lost their rights which gave from their parents.
Moreover
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, the film sector
also
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 has some contribution
in
Change preposition
to
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this
Linking Words
 problem because they
shows
Change the verb form
show
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 some
advance
Replace the word
advanced
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 level scene in the movie
such
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as
Correct word choice
apply
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some films
were
Correct pronoun usage
that were
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 banned in the country because of their script so that they cannot spread dirt in it.
However
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, Here is a solution for the above problems foremost is that
guardian
Fix the agreement mistake
guardians
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 should take care of
child
Add an article
a child
the child
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 that what are they doing ? ,
For instance
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, you should say that you must do study
first
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then
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 you will
done
Change the verb form
do
be done
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 any kind of activities.
secondly
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 , the law should give
notice
Change the article
the notice
show examples
 to remove the scene
otherwise
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 we should
Banned
Change the verb form
Ban
show examples
 it
Linking Words
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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as some films are not
allow
Change the form of the verb
allowed
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 to show minor people
Add the comma(s)
, as a result,
show examples
as a result
Linking Words
 it cannot negative impact on them. In conclusion , people should wake up and try to solve
this
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 problem because children are tomorrow's main so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the government
also
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 must take a decision
for
Change preposition
about
show examples
 it.
Submitted by ssangani6161 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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