Many children these days are using smartphones to a greater extent. Why is this happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, all ages people
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
our
children
Use synonyms
are becoming addicted to technological devices
such
Linking Words
as
smartphones
Use synonyms
. They are influenced by it alarmingly. There are many reasons behind using
smartphones
Use synonyms
to a greater extent. I think that addicting to
smartphones
Use synonyms
have more negative outcomes than
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
Correct your spelling
positivity
positvity
Correct your spelling
positivity
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
our
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
life
Replace the word
live
show examples
.
To begin
Linking Words
with, why is
this
Linking Words
case? You might wonder. Smartphone provides lots of lucrative features on
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
thats
Correct your spelling
that
that's
infatuate our young generation.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
using
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
become easier present
daysthan
Correct your spelling
days than
previous decades. For the well-being of modern technological prowess, in
smartphones
Use synonyms
have lots of specialised attractive functions like
hundread
Correct your spelling
hundred
types of games, all kinds of movies and
curtoones
Correct your spelling
cartoons
which force human beings mainly the child to become addicted on it and
also
Linking Words
conducting these functions are too easy
thats
Correct your spelling
that's
why
children
Use synonyms
don’t find any problem to
use
Use synonyms
it resulting in they pass a huge amount of
time
Use synonyms
by
scrooling
Correct your spelling
scrolling
it.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the costs of
these
Change the determiner
this kindf
show examples
kindf
Correct your spelling
kind
kinds
of
Add an article
the device
show examples
device
Fix the agreement mistake
devices
show examples
are under
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
peoples
Change to a genitive case
people's
peoples'
show examples
affordability, thereby parents and relatives often gift
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
to their kids so that
Correct your spelling
they
thay
Correct your spelling
they
can
Correct your spelling
disturb
distrub
Correct your spelling
disturb
them when they are doing their daily activities.
For instance
Linking Words
, it is often observed that
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
are now prefer
Change the verb form
are now preferred
show examples
to play
a special games
Correct the article-noun agreement
a special game
special games
show examples
called ‘PUBG’ on phones rather than on filed and
gurdian
Correct your spelling
guardian
also
Linking Words
feel relax while they are using phones cause it offers less possibility to get
amy
Correct your spelling
any
my
injury.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
technological
Correct article usage
the technological
show examples
race
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
developing every which
enable
Correct subject-verb agreement
enables
show examples
children
Use synonyms
to
use
Use synonyms
it.
However
Linking Words
, due to using it continuously,
children
Use synonyms
are becoming poor
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their education and falling
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
verious
Correct your spelling
various
serious
diseases.
Children
Use synonyms
should concentrate on education
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
earlier but they spend a great amount of
time
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
operating
smartphones
Use synonyms
and they often don’t realise
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
that how much
time
Use synonyms
they pass
as a result
Linking Words
they don’t make
time
Use synonyms
for education possible leading to get
lesa
Correct your spelling
less
result
Add the particle
to result
show examples
on
exam
Add an article
the exam
an exam
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, they
also
Linking Words
find problems
on
Change preposition
with
show examples
eyes
Correct article usage
the eyes
show examples
, bones and other physical barriers.
For example
Linking Words
, one of my cousins who is a
briliant
Correct your spelling
brilliant
student after having Tablet gets fewer marks
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
academic
Add an article
the academic
show examples
sector and
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
to
puts
Change the verb
put
show examples
a
Change preposition
on a
show examples
sunglas
Correct your spelling
sunglass
for losing eye prosperity due to using tablet progressively.
Thus
Linking Words
, the more you
use
Use synonyms
modern devices
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
earlier
Add an article
an earlier
show examples
age, the lower
time
Use synonyms
you get to do other activities. In conclusion, technological development
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
life faster and the
use
Use synonyms
of it turn
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
simple which makes
children
Use synonyms
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
use
Use synonyms
it more
time
Use synonyms
. Using
smartphones
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
both positive and negative outcomes, but I think that negativity is more than positivity.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: