People should look after their health for personal benefits, rather than a duty for a society. What extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #health #duty #society

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It has been argued that

people

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today should care for their own personal

health

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purely to enjoy the personal benefits that are gained from having good

health

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, rather than as a duty to others in their society.

Personally

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,Personally

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I believe that

people

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should take good care of their

health

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not only to reap the associated benefits

Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

Linking Words

as a way of helping to uplift the lives of the citizens within their own cities and countries. Many

people

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claim that the secret to a happy

life

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is through achieving and maintaining good

health

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, and I

also

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stand by

this

Linking Words

notion. When someone experiences good physical and mental

health

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they are able to enjoy their

life

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to the fullest. Good

health

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allows

people

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to pursue their hopes and dreams and enjoy human relationships with family and friends. Without good mental and physical

health

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, these ideals are difficult to attain.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, today,

people

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are suffering from mental and physical sickness and diseases more so than ever before.

This

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, in turn, causes a heavy load on a country’s healthcare industry and causes large financial burdens to the country’s national budget, which comes at the cost of the

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tax-paying

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tax paying

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tax-paying

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citizens. If

people

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were to look after their

health

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better, it would reduce

such

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financial burdens and the money could

then

Linking Words

be spent on other services that would benefit the quality of

life

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for

the

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apply

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society as a whole. In conclusion, I firmly believe that all

people

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should strive to achieve and maintain the highest levels of

health

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possible not only so that they can be happy and enjoy their own

life

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, but

also

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so that they can contribute

towards

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toward

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a more happy and healthy society around them.

Submitted by rlnambiar98 on Sat Aug 20 2022

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

duty
well-being
burden
healthcare systems
productive
economy
example
empower
informed choices

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People should look after their health for personal benefits, rather than a duty for a society. What extent do you agree or disagree?

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'People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?