IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many young people in the workforce today change their jobs or careers every few years. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #workforce #change #jobs #careers #years #outweigh
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many youngsters change their
jobs
Use synonyms
 or choose different careers every few years. I will analyze the reasons for
this
Linking Words
 trend in the
eassay
Correct your spelling
essay
. I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, young
people
Use synonyms
 quit their
jobs
Use synonyms
 frequently because they are bored
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 doing the same job for a long time. Compared with older generations who work for the same company until retirement, young
people
Use synonyms
 tend to try new career paths. If they cannot get promoted after working for several years, they will hunt for a higher position in another cooperation.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the economic market is increasingly changeable nowadays. Some young individuals quit their original
jobs
Use synonyms
 so as to work in a more profitable industry.
For instance
Linking Words
, a lot of young workers in the internet company pursue a new career path in the
Correct your spelling
artificial
artifical
Correct your spelling
artificial
 intelligence sector, for the latter seems more promising in recent years. From my point of view, the advantages of changing
jobs
Use synonyms
 outweigh its disadvantages.
Firstly
Linking Words
, young
people
Use synonyms
 will not get bored
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
repeating the same work for their lifetime. They are more likely to enjoy what they do.
Moreover
Linking Words
, entering
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 career can improve the skills of young employees, making them more adaptable and experienced to survive in the competitive workplace.
As a result
Linking Words
, they are more likely to succeed in the job market. Importantly, many
people
Use synonyms
 can not only get a higher salary and better welfare but
also
Linking Words
 build up more social networks by changing new
jobs
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, young
people
Use synonyms
 change their
jobs
Use synonyms
 more frequently because of their
passions
Fix the agreement mistake
passion
show examples
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 pursuing new careers and
fast-changing
Add an article
the fast-changing
show examples
 job market. I think that the advantages of
this
Linking Words
Correct your spelling
phenomenon
phenomenen
Correct your spelling
phenomenon
 outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by 1123747551 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: