The prevention of health problems is more important than treatment and medicine. Therefore, governments should spend more money on educating people about healthy lifestyles instead of curing illnesses. How far do you agree with this statement?

#prevention #health #treatment #medicine #governments #money #people #lifestyles #illnesses

The government should spend more resources to educate

people

about the benefits of having a healthy lifestyle as it helps to reduce the chances of getting sick and increases the average life expectancy of the country. As the consumption of junk food has increased over the

last

few decades, a surge of diseases relating to obesity has been observed.

Similarly

, activities like smoking have given rise to the number of

people

suffering from oral cancer. Governments spend a lot of money on the treatment of patients and

nonetheless

the huge investments, not all of them are able to survive. In cases like these, investing in making

people

more aware of the deteriorating effects of a poor lifestyle could save a lot of lives and money.

Although

it is right to say that prevention is better than the cure, sometimes the fittest

people

also

fall prey to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

diseases like brain tumours and cardiac attacks. So, it is

also

important for a country to take of its citizens by providing them

affordable

Change preposition

with affordable

show examples

healthcare services.

Additionally

, many

people

have a busy routine nowadays, and following a strict diet plan or an

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

exercise timetable can be difficult for them. In

such

cases, a little more than education may be required. In conclusion, I would say that campaigns on eating healthy, sleeping early, exercising daily, etc. can definitely create a lot of awareness but it is

also

important for the government to fund medicinal research for the cases where just precautions

could not

Wrong verb form

cannot

show examples

help prevent diseases.

Submitted by cooljumpin on Mon Aug 22 2022

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The prevention of health problems is more important than treatment and medicine. Therefore, governments should spend more money on educating people about healthy lifestyles instead of curing illnesses. How far do you agree with this statement?

Your opinion

Why do students prefer doing part-time jobs during their studies? Do you ‎think this has more advantages or disadvantages?‎

Young people are often influenced in their behaviours and situations by others in the same age. This is called “peer pressure”. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say that increasing business and cultural contacts between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.