Some people prefer to work a lot, and spend less time on leisure activities. I think that this has more drawbacks than benefits

#people #work #time #leisure #activities

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Nowadays, due to huge competition in the corporate, people spend their maximum term completing their struggle

instead

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of doing leisure tasks.

However

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this

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habit tends to increase health issues but a number of times it helps to achieve the target goal in life. In the forthcoming, paragraphs we will discuss all the views of the essay.

To begin

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with, there are a plethora of disadvantages of spending hours in office performance.

Firstly

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, if individuals always concentrate on their job it will be harmful not only to their health but

also

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rise the chance to become depression patients.

Secondly

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, it is necessary for every person to consume pace with their family

otherwise

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, it will cause a detrimental effect on their relationship.

For Example

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, a survey revealed that the main reason behind the increasing number of cases of divorce is that in recent times couples are doing jobs and

hence

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, they are unable to give adequate occasion to each other.

On the other hand

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, sometimes spending more months in workplaces gives more relaxation than free season activities. It helps to build up the strong trust of the employer toward hardworking employees

consequently

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, they can get promotions after a sufficient interval which

also

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helps them in their future growth.

For instance

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, as per The Hindu newspaper survey in ,India most organizations during yearly appraisal present consider the performance as together as moment spent on office projects of the employee .

In addition

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this

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era is the competition era

thus

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every person wants to secure their job and if they give more time to their products they will get an opportunity to enhance their skills in a different field

then

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their chance to become

first

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preference will increase. To conclude, leisure activities are more crucial for the community to release trial stress as well as to make a brilliant relationship with their family ,

however

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, spending appropriate date on their professional task is

also

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essential to achieve growth in future.

Submitted by gurmit.150 on Tue Aug 23 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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17
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

325 words

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Some people prefer to work a lot, and spend less time on leisure activities. I think that this has more drawbacks than benefits

Include an introduction and conclusion

The plans below show how the ground floor of a particular buildings has changed over time.

Some people believe that limited access to water is a critical issue that governments must solve for their citizens. Others, however, think that it is a problem that individual people can solve with technology. Which perspective do you agree with, and why?