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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Today, lots of people have their own computer and a telephone, which made it easy for people to do job at their home. Does working at home have more advantages or more disadvantages?

#lots #people #computer #telephone #job #home
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Nowadays, many individuals possess their own computers and telephones, which has made it convenient for them to work from home.
While
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 there are some drawbacks,
such
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 as feelings of loneliness and isolation, I believe the main benefits,
for instance
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, flexibility and cost savings are more substantial. On the one hand, a potential disadvantage of today is that lots of individuals have their own computer and a telephone, which makes it easy for people to do a job at their house, which may negatively affect their mental health.
For example
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, without the opportunity to physically interact with coworkers, employees might feel disconnected from the team, which can lead to a sense of exclusion. Another perceived negative is that communication challenges.
For instance
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, when team members rely solely on emails or messaging platforms, important nuances or tone can be lost, leading to misunderstandings.
On the other hand
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, a primary advantage of many people having access to their own computers and phones nowadays, making it easier for them to work from home, is increased productivity.
For instance
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, a software developer working from accommodation may find that they can complete coding tasks faster without the typical disruptions of an office setting. A
further
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 benefit is work-life balance.
For example
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, without the need for long commutes, employees can spend more time with family or engage in personal activities,
such
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 as exercising or pursuing hobbies. On balance, it is true that lots of employees have their own computer and a telephone, which makes it easy for people to do a job at home today, which would seem disadvantageous under certain circumstances.
However
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, in my view, its positive effects in terms of flexibility and cost savings override the disadvantages.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and develop it thoroughly. This can help avoid repetition and make your argument clearer.
coherence cohesion
Use more varied linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Expand on your points with more detailed and varied examples to make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
task achievement
Consider addressing counterarguments more explicitly to show a balanced perspective.
task achievement
The essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages of working from home, providing a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly presents the topic and the writer's stance, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.
task achievement
Relevant and appropriate examples are used to illustrate the main points made in the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • telecommuting
  • remote work
  • work-life balance
  • overhead costs
  • productivity
  • isolation
  • communication barriers
  • collaboration tools
  • flexible schedule
  • blurred boundaries
  • commuting expenses
  • mental health impact
  • home office
  • professional attire
  • distractions
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