It is true that tourism in many locations is a main source of earning money. although it has its own negative effects, I believe advantages of tourism outweigh its disadvantages.

On the one
hand
Add a comma
,hand
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the
Correct article usage
a
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wide variety of job opportunities has been created. from transportation to accommodation and from food relevant jobs to souvenir production ,that lots of local
resident
Change to a plural noun
residents
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could involve in.
In addition
, since
the
Correct article usage
apply
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traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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and
tourism
have
Add an article
a challenge
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challenge
Fix the agreement mistake
challenges
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with lots of
career
Change to a plural noun
careers
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,
thus
, cash flow is increased. the governments could spend
this
fortune on infrastructures of the city and developing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high-quality services for both people of the country and tourists.
On the other hand
,
tourism
should have been examined
exact
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exactly
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from other points of view.
firstly
, culture and religious exchange might lead
some
Change preposition
to some
show examples
conflict between host and
gest
Correct your spelling
guest
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.as an example drinking wine is a common issue in many countries around the world but in Muslim countries, which have lots of
tourism
Replace the word
tourist
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destinations, is
a
Correct article usage
apply
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taboo.
secondly
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,secondly
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crime rate could increase,
such
as
Change preposition
to
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illegal purchases or smuggling. if there is not any strong supervision to control,
this
could become a serious problem. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
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tourism
in some
destination
Fix the agreement mistake
destinations
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is the basic source of income so with put some
high value
Add a hyphen
high-value
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boundaries
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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could be
really
Correct article usage
a really
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promising industry.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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