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Band 4

Some governments spend a lot of public money training individuals to be successful in international sporting events. Some people believe that this money should be spent on things that will benefit the general public instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#governments #money #individuals #events #people #benefit
Not some
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
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 but almost every government does the same thing. I
am totally agree
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totally agree
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on
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with
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 investing some money
on
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in
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 the growth of an individual for the sake
on
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of
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international
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the international
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 sport. So that they can make the
nation
 proud. But
on the other
hand
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,hand
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 I must say that it should be in balance. I am not at all in the support of it, that you do have poverty in the
country
, people are facing the issues of employment, they hardly have food to eat, no education in the
country
,
instead
 of giving
a
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apply
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sight to the major topics you are only
intrested
Correct your spelling
interested
 in making your
nation
 proud.
Country
Add an article
The country
A country
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 need schools, hospitals, good education and health, employment and girl safety, rather paying
attention
 to these vital topics if you are paying
attention
 towards
such
 activities so
this
 is not justified at all. We need a government that
pay
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pays
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 equal
attention
to
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apply
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everywhere. Be its education, sports, health,
entrtainment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
,
crime
Correct word choice
or crime
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. The
attention
 should be equal.
This
 is my personal opinion access of
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
 is bad, if you are paying 100%
attention
 to a single topic so the
second
 entity will effect and it will impact you too. If
public
Add an article
the public
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have
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has
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Correct your spelling
chosen
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
 you as PM so you have to live up to their expectation. Rather
putting
Change preposition
than putting
show examples
 100%
attention
 to a single topic pay
attention
 to every sector and try to make the
nation
 proud in every
Correct your spelling
field
feild
Correct your spelling
field
. India is a golden bird,
its
Correct your spelling
it's
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 the most diverse
country
 still we are one
Nation
,
I
Correct word choice
and I
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proud
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 my
country
.
Submitted by shailjameel2410 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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