As a esult of electronic inventions,people do less physical activity and this is having a negative effective on health. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#esult #inventions #people #activity #health

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Due to the advent of technology,

individuals

Use synonyms

perform less exercise and it is having a detrimental impact on their wellbeing.I totally agree because it takes more

time

Use synonyms

and is addictive.

This

Linking Words

essay will explain in detail the reasons for my stance as well as examples in the subsequent paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with,the primary cause of illness is modern inventions.Most

individuals

Use synonyms

spend more

time

Use synonyms

using their mobile phones and laptops.They become dependent on

this

Linking Words

technology which makes them forget to play outdoor games

such

Linking Words

as Soccer,Basketball and Volleyball.These games are physically demanding and help them to burn excess calories in the body.Excess fat causes Obesity.

For example

Linking Words

,Obesity is a factor of diseases like Hypertension and Diabetes mellitus .

hence

Linking Words

,the new inventions have made inhabitants spend most of their

time

Use synonyms

indoors.If

individuals

Use synonyms

involve themselves in outdoor

activities

Use synonyms

,diseases like hypertension will be reduced.

Secondly

Linking Words

,another reason modern inventions make

individuals

Use synonyms

perform less physical

activities

Use synonyms

is Addiction.When

individuals

Use synonyms

start using these machines.They rely on it for most of their

activities

Use synonyms

and stayed glued to the phone and computer screen for a long

time

Use synonyms

which causes eye problems in the long run.

Although

Linking Words

technology makes work easier,Citizens will suffer.

Moreover

Linking Words

,a lot of people tend to drive their cars

instead

Linking Words

of walking to the nearby stores to purchase a product. In conclusion,reliance and consumption of

time

Use synonyms

are the two reasons Artificial intelligence makes citizens do inadequate physical

activities

Use synonyms

and has resulted in poor well-being.

Submitted by yahayasonde2 on Wed Aug 24 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

232 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in todays world, subjects like Science and technology are most important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
With the advancement of technology and science, citizens’ lives have dramatically changed these days. Some people argue that history should be considered one of the most significant academic disciplines, while others disagree with this, stating that more practical subjects are more important than the past.
7
band
You are having problems with a neighbour’s animals because the fence between your properties is old and In poor repair. You want the neighbour to pay half the cost of building a new fence. Write a letter to your neighbour. In your letter •say what the problems are •explain how a new fence will solve the problems •suggest that the neighbour pays half of the cost
I hope this letter finds you in radiant health and best of the spirits. I am writing this letter to inform you that the fence between our houses is now replaced.
7
band
In some countries, owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
In today’s society, with the evolving social landscape, many people argue that purchasing a home instead of renting one is crucial. This essay will outline the root causes of this phenomenon, and I believe that this trend leads to more adverse impacts than benefits.
6.5
band
In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. do you think this positive or negative development?
Statistics show that the world’s population is increasing rapidly. It is expected that most of us will be living in cities within the next few decades. The question of whether urbanization is a positive or negative development remains controversial.
6.5
band
Some people think that cities are the best places to live. Others prefer to live in rural areas. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Every man comes to this question sometimes: what is the best place to live? Living a active live in a busy town or having more relaxed lifetime in the remote area. Today we are going to discuss both sides.

As a esult of electronic inventions,people do less physical activity and this is having a negative effective on health. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in todays world, subjects like Science and technology are most important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. do you think this positive or negative development?

Some people think that cities are the best places to live. Others prefer to live in rural areas. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.