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At the present, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this stiuation outweigh the disadvantages?

#population #countries #adults #people #stiuation
With the advance of urban development, more and more young population choose to move from rural into
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
. Recently, the
people
 of some nations
involving
Wrong verb form
involve
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an amount
Change the quantifier
a number
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 of young adults, compared with the older group. In my concept, the benefits are more than
drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
show examples
 in
this
 situation There are some advantages, Among these, there are two benefits. One is that it has
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
labor
Change the spelling
labour
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 population. Approximately, the normal can bring numbers of economical than the old
people
 because of the ability of action.
This
 ability even
effects
Replace the word
affects
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 the city or
country
's development.
Additionally
, it is helpful for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
developing city due to young
people
 have more innovative than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
older.
However
, there are a little of
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
disdavantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
, if the place which is helpful to get
profession
Add an article
a profession
show examples
, the young
people
 will want to leave
original
Correct pronoun usage
their original
show examples
 hometown into high technology
country
 to live. And,
this
 situation cause other
nation
Fix the agreement mistake
nations
show examples
Fix the infinitive
to have
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 too many old
people
 to afford.
Moreover
, it probably
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 the
country
 which has a lot of old
people
 improve moderately.
For instance
, the young population usually leave their
country
 to some high develop nation to get
job
Add an article
a job
show examples
 in
southern
Add an article
the southern
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 area or southern eastern
fild
Correct your spelling
field
. In their hometown, the older residents accumulate more and more In some countries, whether the young
people
 or not is a coin
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 two
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
show examples
.
Nevertheless
, I still think the advantages of
this
 part
overheigh
Correct your spelling
overweigh
overweight
overheight
 the disadvantages.
Submitted by yachenchu on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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