IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people argue that the government should spend money only on medical care and education but not on theaters or sports stadiums. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #money #care #education #theaters #sports #stadiums
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One of the major
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
show examples
 of our society is how the
government
todecide
Correct your spelling
to decide
 spend
money
.In the
last
 year some research
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
 us ,
the
Correct word choice
that the
show examples
 population is uncertain about the
government
 spending
money
 in the right way.Almost part is a
truly
Change the adverb
true
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 believers in the fact the
government
 may spend more fond on
education
 and
medical
Correct article usage
the medical
show examples
 system.
In
Change preposition
On
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 the opposite ,trends
another
Change preposition
in another
show examples
 category shows us entertainment like sport event or theatre have to lose some
founds
Correct your spelling
funds
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 allocate to them.,Personally
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
Correct your spelling
agree
toagree
Correct your spelling
to agree
agree
 with the fact the
Correct your spelling
government
gouvernament
Correct your spelling
government
 has to use more
money
 on health and
education
 because these two aspects
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 are well known around the world is the foundation for the future of one nation. In the medical ,
sistem
Correct your spelling
system
 the
government
 must allocate more found for medical
Correct your spelling
system
sistem
Correct your spelling
systems
for example
 training
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
specialists in cardiology.I truly believe is the
government
 should spend capital
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 medical systems in training
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
infrastructure.
In addition
Add a comma
,
show examples
the
government
 should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
build a strong medical university for the future of the people's health. Another aspect
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think is crucial for our society is
education
 ,the
government
 has to
restriction
Replace the word
restrict
show examples
 the
education
 to form well the future students
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 mean ,the students
whose
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 oriented to art
Correct your spelling
to have
tohave
Correct your spelling
to have
 go
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
art school,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 mean the high school teenager have to study the most part the subject which interested in.Another aspect very important is the
government
 have to create a program which
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
family
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
 with
financial
Add an article
a financial
show examples
 issue,those children have to complete their study.In my ,opinion if the population have
money
 to spend on children's
education
 the rate of illiteracy will decrease.
In
Change preposition
For
show examples
 the most part of the aspect
generally
Add a comma
,generally
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think is a better option to invest in our
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
Correct your spelling
education
eduation
Correct your spelling
education
 and in the medical system.If the population is healthy and educated will produce more
mone
Correct your spelling
money
show examples
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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