IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Topic: Crime rate in most countries is often higher in urban areas than rural areas. why do you think that is? what can be done to reduce crime rate?

#topic #crime #rate #countries #areas
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It is undeniable that nowadays, the population tend to commit
crimes
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 has increased for many
reasons
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. Some people believe that the percentage of crime in most
countries
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 dramatically increased in the city as much as in suburban
areas
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.
However
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, from my point of view, I agree with the previous point and have possibilities to solve these
problems
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, the
reasons
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 to support and describe the details will be outlined.
First
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 of all, I strongly believe that the crime rate is increasing nowadays most of the
criminals
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 who commit
crimes
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 have
reasons
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 and
that is
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 the main cause.
Additionally
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, the solution to these
causes
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 the law enforcement officers should investigate these
causes
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 by asking the
reasons
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, why most of them need to commit the
crimes
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 and become good listeners most of these is a small
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cases
Change the noun form
case
show examples
such
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 as stealing valuable things and fighting most incidents happen in rural
areas
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 more than urban
areas
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.
On the contrary
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, Some
criminals
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 commit
crimes
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 without
reasons
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 or unforgivable
reasons
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such
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 as racist
cases
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 and mass-shooting
cases
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 most of these criminal
cases
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 happen in urban
areas
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.
Additionally
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, the
causes
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 are from some
countries
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 people have the right to have a gun or use human rights in the wrong way. The best way to fix these
problems
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 is that
countries
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 should have new laws and seriously vanish these
problems
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 by gaining the penalty in guilt. In conclusion, some
criminals
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 committed the crime because they have their own
reasons
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 most of them commit small
crimes
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such
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 as stealing valuable things and fighting the ways to solve these
problems
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 law enforcement officers should investigate these
causes
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 by asking that
reasons
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 and become good listeners, while Some
criminals
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 commit the
crimes
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 without
reasons
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 or unforgivable
reasons
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such
Linking Words
 as racist-
cases
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 and mass-shooting
cases
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 that incident most happen in urban
areas
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 and the way to solve these solutions is the
countries
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 should have new laws and seriously to vanish these
problems
Use synonyms
 by gain the penalty in guilt.
Submitted by narongdejteeranurak on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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