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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawback

These day
Change the determiner
This day
These days
show examples
, it has become a prevalent phenomenon that many people decide to
studying
Change the verb form
study
show examples
 out of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 home town, thanks to the advancement of technology and transportation under
Correct your spelling
globalization
gloabalization
Correct your spelling
globalisation
. I believe that
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
 trend are outweighed by its disadvantages. On the one hand, one of the most significant advantages of
this
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 development is that
students
Use synonyms
 can learn more language during
this
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 period.
Moreover
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,
students
Use synonyms
 can
made
Change the verb form
make
be made
show examples
 friends
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other countries.
Consequently
Linking Words
, It allows them to be more sociality and confident to talk
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 other
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
 and become more native in
this
Linking Words
. It is likely that a student uses English when that person
studied
Wrong verb form
studies
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 The United Kingdom, it will lead that person to intend to use
this
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 language to communicate with
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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. It made the oversea
students
Use synonyms
 more
sactisfy
Correct your spelling
satisfy
 and confident to use
another languages
Replace the adjective
another language
other languages
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are significant disadvantages of
students
Use synonyms
 will be far away from their
hometown
Fix the agreement mistake
hometowns
show examples
 and families. Probably the
first
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 idea popping in mind is that it means that
students
Use synonyms
 who
studying
Change the form of the verb
study
show examples
out
Change preposition
outside
show examples
 of their home town,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
need to be independent.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, we have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
developed transport it made people more convenient to travelling. In Additional,
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the leap in information technology, there are many social media
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 easier to contact and make
Correct your spelling
video
vedio
Correct your spelling
video
call
Fix the agreement mistake
calls
show examples
 with families or friends. I would
therefore
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 agree that
although
Linking Words
 there are
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
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 the current trend
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 going to
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
 for studying, they are outweighed by the benefits. It can enrich people's experience
another
Change preposition
of another
show examples
 region's culture and
also
Linking Words
 make more foreign friends.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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