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Band 4

There are many things that motivate a person to work, but money is the most compelling. In your opinion, how influential is the power of money?

#person #work #money #power
It is apparent that nowadays there are various reasons motivating
people
 to continue to work in their jobs. It is widely believed that
money
 is the most prominent factor.
However
, I disagree with
this
 viewpoint and
also
 consider that job
satisfaction
 is more important than salary. The overall of both factors will be discussed in detail in the following paragraphs. It is true to say that
money
 plays an essential role in many aspects of daily life.
For instance
, daily
expenditure
Fix the agreement mistake
expenditures
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,
such
 as food, personal expense, transportation, doom notation, and education, involves directly
with
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apply
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an income. It is undeniable that
money
 affects the quality of life and status.
That is
 why it can encourage
people
 to stay in the workforce in order to earn a salary.
However
, the literal reason which inspires
people
 is job
satisfaction
. Enjoying working provides them with a sense of
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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, leading to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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growth in their career path. To illustrate,
people
 tend to choose
Add an article
an occupation
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occupation
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occupations
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 from their interests and deftness before looking for an income. Even if they are earning
high
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a high
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 salary, but feel
stress
Wrong verb form
stressed
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 and work under pressure, they will not enjoy their life.
Consequently
, it might end with resigning. Compared to
people
 who are working with happiness because they can do what they like which motivates and contributes to success in their jobs.
In other words
,
money
 cannot guarantee
satisfaction
 and ambition to keep working. In conclusion, I disagree that
money
 is the most significant reason
,
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apply
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 since I strongly believe that job
satisfaction
 is the most necessary factor when considering the motivation of
people
 in their career.
Submitted by ariyabiebl2608 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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