IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

It is important for people to take risks, both in their personal lives and professional lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages

#people #risks #lives #risk
Some
people
 don’t want to settle for what they have already got
therefore
, they insist on taking
risks
 in
life
.
Although
 risking in some situations can turn out to be beneficial,
people
 should not continuously rely on it. On the one hand, everyone has to
risk
 something in order to start improving and getting better positions both in their personal and professional
life
.
People
 will miss 100% of the shots they don’t take. There is always a little uncertainty about the result of every decision but
this
 should not stop anyone from being ambitious. An example of the advantages of taking
risks
 in personal
life
 is when someone confesses his
/
her feelings to a loved one.
This
 is really a
risk
 that
this
 person takes because, he
/
she might get rejected and, his
/
her feelings get hurt.
On the contrary
, if he
/
she succeeds,
this
 will become the best decision he
/
she has ever made. The same thing applies to taking
risks
 in one’s professional
life
.
People
 will not get hired or promoted if they don’t take the
risk
 of applying for new positions.
On the other hand
,
risk
-taking seems to have many disadvantages and, it is not recommended to be done very often.
First
, compromising both the case of career and personal
life
 can be extremely stressful.
This
 might cause mental and physical problems in long term.
Moreover
, the chance of going down with failure is something that everyone should consider.
This
 is why
people
 need to think through their decisions more carefully before acting on them. Taking a bad
risk
 in professional
life
 may only jeopardize one’s career but, in personal ,
life
 the cost is irrecoverable
hence
,
people
 need to be very conscious about it. In conclusion, it seems to me that taking
risks
 is not always beneficial and
people
 should be aware of the consequences of their decisions.
Submitted by bayatz80 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: