Children today are too dependent on computers and electronic entertainment. it would be better to encourage them to spend more time outside playing sports. d you agree or disagree

#children #computers #entertainment #time #sports

Technology has been in the life of every child since the day they were born, whether for leisure time or educational purposes;

As a result

, they rarely see the sunlight.

This

has been a growing issue for the

last

decade, as it affects today's kids majorly- and not in a good manner. In

this

essay, I will be expressing my opinion on the matter and giving reasons for them. It is well known in the medical field that the lack of movement results in health issues. Being online almost all the time makes it easier for the negative effect to occur.

Therefore

, it is better for people in general, and kids in specific, to enjoy at least 3 hours outside, with no electronics. It is important to be active so as to not face major issues later on in life.

Moreover

, young individuals need to learn to socialize in places other than games; they need to experience the real world and not from just a screen. Nowadays, children tend to have almost no connection with the place around them: which is a problem because it can have a bad influence on their mental health.

This

generation has the highest ratio of depression, anxiety, and social anxiety; coincidently, it is the generation that grew indoors, with almost no outdoor activities.

Lastly

, they are at an age where their personalities are getting into shape; how can one create a personality, a hobby, or anything, when all they know is artificial- whether it is from social media or an online game

Change the punctuation

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It is important for them, at

this

stage, to experience life and know what it is about.

Also

as for them to get to know themselves and build their self-confidence; how can one do that when all they see is fake perfection? In conclusion, it is important for the youth to go out, meet people, and make healthy habits. As it will affect their future majorly- for the better or worse- being safe and increasing outdoor activities is better than being sorry later on.

Submitted by joumanabassam5 on Wed Sep 07 2022

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Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

342 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Children today are too dependent on computers and electronic entertainment. it would be better to encourage them to spend more time outside playing sports. d you agree or disagree

Fully explain your ideas

Some groups, such as poor people or people from rural area find it is difficult to access the university education. Universities should make it especially easy for the students come from the rural areas get an access to the university. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

.You have joined a new job recently. Write to your friend about your new job. In your letter •describe the reason for quitting the previous job •show your excitement for a new job and other details •say about your salary package

Some believe that people will purchase a product based on their needs and advertising is not needed.

Air traffic is increasingly leading to more noise, pollution, and airport construction. Some people say that government should try to reduce air traffic by taxing it more heavily. Do you agree or disagree?

Students are becoming more and more reliant on the internet. While the internet is convenient, it has many negative effects and its use for educational purposes should be restricted.