Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program but extent do you agree or disagree

In
this
contemporary Era ,
education
plays an imperative role in everyone's life as per the given notion financial
education
should be a mandatory component of the school program I partially agree with the given statement and will discuss
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
the subsequent paragraphs
perior
Correct your spelling
prior
to the meaningful conclusion . on the one hand,
let
Add a missing verb
let's
show examples
shed some light on the given
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
view point
Correct your spelling
viewpoint
show examples
as we know
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
financial
education
plays a vital role in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adult life .To commence with, when they earn money they do not have any idea how to tackle
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
expenses and they spend their capital on unnecessary things .
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
they have no
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
benefit .
Moreover
, if
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial
education
provides to the student they face no
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
type of difficulty and they are able to full fill their basic needs.
On the other hand
,some students
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are not in favour
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
decision because of
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
some reason. To embark with,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers are busy
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
their hectic
schedule
Fix the agreement mistake
schedules
show examples
and they already have a lot of subjects which they have read.
secondly
,if financial
education
should be compulsory
this
may distract their attention from the other subjects and may impact
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
overall development . To encapsulate ,it could be concluded that,according to me additional subjects must have
this
financial subject owing to which they do not face any type of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
difficulty in the future.
Submitted by jaahandeep200018 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: