IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

You have been working with your company for two years and are interested in a promotion. Write a letter to your direct boss. In your letter: • Explain your varied achievements over the past two years • Express your interest in growing with the company • Ask for a meeting to discuss a potential promotion

#company #two #years #promotion #boss #achievements #interest
Dear Mr Robert, I am writing
this
 letter to bring your
in
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apply
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notice
Add an article
the notice
a notice
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 that I am Perry working in your company since 2020. It is almost two years
Correct word choice
since i
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i
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I
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 have given
best
Correct pronoun usage
my best
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 to
organization
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the organization
an organization
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. Now, I request you on the basis of my performance please give me
chance
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the chance
a chance
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of
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for
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 promotion. I am working as an Assistant Marketing sales in your office. I have
awarded
Add a missing verb
been awarded
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as
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apply
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a
Change the article
the
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 best employee of
Year
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the Year
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 2021. I have completed the target of sales in
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 two years and
help
Wrong verb form
helped
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 to make
establishment
Correct article usage
the establishment
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 profitable. Even, I have given a presentation
last
 year in which I got awarded. My main aim behind
this
 promotion is to develop Managerial skills
besides
this
, I find myself capable of handling crucial situations.
Also
, as a manager one is
the
Correct article usage
apply
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responsible for each aspect of their department,
thus
 it will be a good step for an individual’s personal growth as it will provide them with more exposure. I wish you can spare some time and organize
meeting
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a meeting
the meeting
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.
This
 could help you decide on which position you may nominate me
in
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for in
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 your company. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours Sincerely, Perry
Submitted by jasmeetkaur2016 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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