IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Today foods travel thousands of miles from the farm to the consumers. Why is this? Is it a positive or negative trend?

#foods #travel #thousands #miles #farm #consumers #trend
In
this
 period of ,technology
people
 can
taste
food
 from all over the world, because consumers can import
food
 due availability of transportation.In my opinion , It has many merits which outweigh its demerits with
this
 notion and my opinion will be discussed in
further
 paragraphs with a suitable conclusion. First,
Food
 can be imported from most places by air or water . The storage facility is
also
 improved by which
food
 which tends to ruin easily can be stored for many days.
Additionally
 , Currency exchange is
also
 easy nowadays , so
farmers
 do not have to worry about payment. Now if we
say
Verb problem
talk
show examples
 about the bright side ,
farmers
 are getting a better amount of money than local markets;
for example
 , dollars have more value if converted into rupees.
Moreover
, Nowadays many
people
 are travelling overseas and they don'
t
 want to miss their
taste
 which tends to buy them imported
food
 of their preference from grocery stores.which makes
this
 trend more positive as they don'
t
 have to miss their favourite cuisines
due to
 lack of ingredients.
On the other hand
,
This
 trend is impacting local
farmers
 because now consumers are more attracted to imported
food
 rather than local
food
 .
In addition
 to that ,some
people
 don'
t
 want to
taste
 new flavours and remain strict with their choices and flavours which makes
local
Add an article
the local
show examples
 market less predictable and more and more
food
 gets wasted . Local
farmers
 are suffering so much
due to
this
 as many
people
 in their area are trying different
food
 and can make that forever choice.
To sum up
 , without any doubt , it is a mixed bag . But ,
certainly
Add a comma
certainly,
show examples
 it has more upsides than downsides. Considering as consumer side they don'
t
 have to worry about variety and
taste
 but it definitely impacts local
farmers
 .
Submitted by pooja.raikwar27 on

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task response
The essay addresses the prompt effectively, discussing the reasons for the trend of foods traveling long distances and evaluating it as a positive or negative trend.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction introduces the topic and the writer's opinion clearly. Each paragraph develops a separate aspect of the topic and transitions between ideas are smooth. A conclusion summarizing the main points is provided.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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