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Band 4.5

Write about the following topic: Some people think it would be a good idea for schools to teach every young person how to be a good parent. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Describe the skills a person needs to be a good parent. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #people #idea #schools #person #parent #skills
Schools must not only focus on teaching subjects but must help
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children
children's
childrens
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children
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
 new skills including social matters
such
 as parenting.
Yes
Add the punctuation
,Yes
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 agree we should implement
this
 brilliant thought to make a better future for the coming
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generation
generations
genration
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generation
. If
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children
childrens
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children
show examples
 were taught to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
, they will learn to respect their father and mother and know
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 not an easy job to be a
parent
.Youngsters going to schools have the capability to adopt everything taught at
those period
Change the determiner
that period
those periods
show examples
 of
time
 and live the rest of
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 life with
this
principal
Correct your spelling
principle
show examples
.
For example
, the
children
 look for a role model either in their teacher or in their father and mother,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 they act and pretend to be similar to them. If they learn
love
Add the particle
to love
show examples
 and care the output will turn hate into love . To be a
parent
 one needs to
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sacrifice
sacrfice
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sacrifice
 his own
time
 and energy to spend
time
 with their
children
. Looking after
children
doesnt
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doesn't
 only mean
to play
Change the verb form
playing
show examples
 with them but need to
look
Wrong verb form
looking
show examples
 after their education and their medical expenses. Raising
children
 without any condition and
instead
 giving them unconditional love and affection even after they made tons of mistakes. Correcting their mistakes and
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
being positive allows them to speak and express
freely
Correct pronoun usage
themselves freely
show examples
 without fear and hesitation. As we all know good upbringing starts from home and a school for a young person is their
second
 home where they spend most of their
time
 during early age and
thus
 educating to be a good
parent
 should be made
mandetory
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mandatory
 at every high school to make a brighter future.
Submitted by ieltsfay on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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