IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Write about the following topic: Some people think it would be a good idea for schools to teach every young person how to be a good parent. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Describe the skills a person needs to be a good parent. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #people #idea #schools #person #parent #skills
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Schools must not only focus on teaching subjects but must help
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
 new skills including social matters
such
Linking Words
 as parenting.
Yes
Add the punctuation
,Yes
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 agree we should implement
this
Linking Words
 brilliant thought to make a better future for the coming
Correct your spelling
generation
generations
genration
Correct your spelling
generation
. If
Correct your spelling
children
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 were taught to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
Use synonyms
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
, they will learn to respect their father and mother and know
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 not an easy job to be a
parent
Use synonyms
.Youngsters going to schools have the capability to adopt everything taught at
those period
Change the determiner
that period
those periods
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 of
time
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 and live the rest of
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 life with
this
Linking Words
principal
Correct your spelling
principle
show examples
.
For example
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, the
children
Use synonyms
 look for a role model either in their teacher or in their father and mother,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
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 they act and pretend to be similar to them. If they learn
love
Add the particle
to love
show examples
 and care the output will turn hate into love . To be a
parent
Use synonyms
 one needs to
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sacrifice
sacrfice
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sacrifice
 his own
time
Use synonyms
 and energy to spend
time
Use synonyms
 with their
children
Use synonyms
. Looking after
children
Use synonyms
doesnt
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doesn't
 only mean
to play
Change the verb form
playing
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 with them but need to
look
Wrong verb form
looking
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 after their education and their medical expenses. Raising
children
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 without any condition and
instead
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 giving them unconditional love and affection even after they made tons of mistakes. Correcting their mistakes and
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
being positive allows them to speak and express
freely
Correct pronoun usage
themselves freely
show examples
 without fear and hesitation. As we all know good upbringing starts from home and a school for a young person is their
second
Linking Words
 home where they spend most of their
time
Use synonyms
 during early age and
thus
Linking Words
 educating to be a good
parent
Use synonyms
 should be made
mandetory
Correct your spelling
mandatory
 at every high school to make a brighter future.
Submitted by ieltsfay on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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