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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give opinions

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations
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Opinions are divided on whether
people
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 should accept the hardships in
life
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 or whether
people
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 have to find a way out of
such
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 situations and strive for better living conditions. Though I understand the reasons for which
people
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 tend to move towards acceptance of their difficulties, I am still in
favor
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favour
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 of the latter point of view. Those who believe that it is preferable to accept their unfortunate fate may have some arguments. They may argue that
such
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 situations are inevitable in
life
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,
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 and that we cannot control the output.
In other words
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, these supporters believe that everything happens for a reason, and one should not try to overcome the situations,
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instead
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,instead
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people
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 should view
such
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 problems
from
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in
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 a positive light.
However
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, I think that only a group of
people
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 with special scenarios
such
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 as extreme poverty or lifelong illness are prone to
this
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 viewpoint. Because the aforementioned
people
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 are not blessed with many choices in
life
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, their sole option is to accept the misfortune, since trying to improve may actually worsen the situation.
Nevertheless
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, I believe that there are
also
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 many reasons in support of the latter viewpoint.
First
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 of all,
people
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 who put in the effort to improve their hardships may reach happiness. Being financially free or having a successful career can provide
people
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 with confidence or a deep sense of
fulfillment
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fulfilment
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, which acts as a pathway to a joyful
life
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.
Secondly
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,
people
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 may acquire valuable skills and
life
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 lessons along their journey through
life
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as a result
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. Since
people
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 are forced to expand their knowledge and relationships to cope with the destined challenges they face in
life
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,
this
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 will
consequently
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 result in intrapersonal development afterwards. In conclusion, it is understandable why some
people
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 accept the difficulties in
life
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.
However
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, I still believe that it is much better for
people
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 to find the answers to their problems.
Submitted by walltran0309 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adversity
  • resilience
  • stoicism
  • contentment
  • cope
  • adapt
  • endure
  • persevere
  • settle
  • ambition
  • tenacious
  • determined
  • resourceful
  • optimistic
  • self-improvement
  • proactive
  • initiative
  • transform
  • overcome
  • confront
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