some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time .This can benefit teenageers and the community as well .to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit #teenageers

More and more schools start to encourage students to do some voluntary activities in the

neighborhood

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neighbourhood

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

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because they believe it will benefit not only teenagers

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apply

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but

also

Add an article

the neighborhood

a neighborhood

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neighborhood

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neighbourhood

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in many ways.Personally, I totally agree with

this

statement

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apply

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and will illustrate the reasons in much more detail.

Firstly

,young students are at the age when they are forming personalities,while participating in those voluntary activities will definitely be a good chance to better themselves,

such

as thinking in other's shoes and

become

Wrong verb form

becoming

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more empathetic.It is a very perfect opportunity for teenagers to work in the community,where they will be exposed to different situations,

such

as solving problems or organising activities with people from various backgrounds.By dealing with these issues which are rare to happen in school life,they will force to learn many skills and capacities,like skills of communication and leadership which are significant for them to get a decent job in the future when competing with other candidates.

Secondly

,it will

also

bring many benefits to

district

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the district

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as well,

Usually

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,Usually

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it would cost them a lot of money to fix the problems or by hiring people to complete some tasks,those unpaid volunteers will do the same thing to some extent,maybe less comparable to experts.The saved money could be used somewhere else,like building some facilities and replacing the age-old instruments in the community,so the entire environment of the

neighborhood

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neighbourhood

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will have been improved.

Thus

,all those positive changes will delight the people and level their life quality

up as

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a return. To sum up,If every teenager has access to voluntary work in the community,their personal traits will be shaped in a positive way,and our

neighborhood

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neighbourhood

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will

also

get better and better.

Submitted by 980907152 on Fri Sep 16 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

mandatory
unpaid
community work
teenagers
free time
benefit
responsibility
empathy
skills
learning opportunities
freedom
resentment
motivation

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some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time .This can benefit teenageers and the community as well .to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some think newspapers are the best method for reading the news while others think other media is better. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

an increasing number of people choose to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why do people want to change the way they look? And Is it a positive or negative development?

Nowdays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case ? What could be the disadvantages of being self- employed?

Some businesses find that their new employees lack in basic interpersonal skills such as lack of ability to work with colleagues as a team. What are the causes and suggest possible solutions. Also provide relevant examples from your experience.