some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time .This can benefit teenageers and the community as well .to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #community #work #time #benefit #teenageers

It is true that

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

less social experience

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

to their parents

Change preposition

show examples

the same age.

Therefore

, someone suggested that teenagers should do

community

work

without salary in their free time. In my opinion, I

am totally agree

Change the verb form

totally agree

show examples

with

this

viewpoint.

First

of all,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

community

work

would give young people an

irreplacable

Correct your spelling

irreplaceable

chance

Correct your spelling

change

show examples

in their life

Change preposition

show examples

the exact time. Nowadays, students have

took

Change the verb form

taken

show examples

too much time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

studying, when they have

chance

Add an article

a chance

the chance

show examples

, they always choose to do social affairs or

palying

Correct your spelling

playing

paying

online games in cyberspace.

However

, the only way to learn how to be with other people is

stay

Change the verb form

to stay

staying

show examples

together.

Work

Wrong verb form

Working

show examples

Correct your spelling

community

Correct article usage

a comunity

show examples

comunity

Correct your spelling

community

means everyone should learn how to cooperate with each other. It is not a game online

Correct your spelling

without

wihout

Correct your spelling

without

any result.

Work

means lots of duties ,disciplines,and communication skills. With the practice in

community

work

, a young guy could

grown

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grow

show examples

qucickly

Correct your spelling

quickly

, and get deep meaning of the border between himself and others.

Hence

he could be more independent than before. Meanwhile, they would

lost

Change the verb form

lose

be lost

show examples

nothing if they cannot be accepted by the

community

. The faults they made could be

Correct your spelling

transferred

transfered

Correct your spelling

transferred

Change preposition

into

show examples

wonderful experiences for their future. To the

community

, adult workers could

also

get benefits too.

Although

they would have to pay more attention to

take

Wrong verb form

taking

show examples

care of the youth, the duty would

also

inspire their

patient

Replace the word

patience

show examples

and responsibility. And they would

heard

Change the verb form

hear

show examples

some different and new ideas from

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

generation, which would be very helpful to the improvement of the

community

.At least, the gas in the office will become interesting. In conclusion, I would like to say, one of the best

idea

Fix the agreement mistake

ideas

show examples

for teenagers today is to put them in some communities.

Submitted by 7303138 on Fri Sep 16 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

278 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

mandatory
unpaid
community work
teenagers
free time
benefit
responsibility
empathy
skills
learning opportunities
freedom
resentment
motivation

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some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time .This can benefit teenageers and the community as well .to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Fast food is becoming a part of people's daily life everwhere, and this has had negative effects on our lifestyle and diet. Do you agree or disagree?

some people beleive that it is important to keep the home and the work place tidy and organized. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view.

Some people think that people should choose their job based on income in order to provide security to their families. Do you think money is an important factor when choosing a job? What other factors should be considered

Consumers are faced with increasing number of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think are consumers influenced by advertisement ? what measure can be taken to protect them.

'People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?