IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people say now that we can see films on our phones or tablet there is no need to go to the cinemas, others say to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #films #phones #tablet #cinemas #cinema
With the development of technology, we are able to enjoy films through our mobile devices.So a lot of
people
 argue that it is unnecessary for us to go to cinemas anymore.Personally,I totally disagree with
this
 statement and strongly believe that there are still some realistic meanings for the existence of
cinema
.
Firstly
,
cinema
 is the place where
people
 can easily engage with the plots,
thus
 leaving some thought-provoking which can not gain from your handsets.Being fully around those fantastic affections in the
movie
 theatre,
such
 as sitting on the comfortable seats and awesome 3D screen and so on,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can make
people
 much more focused,
thus
 will leave them a deeper impression than on a phone or tablet.
For example
,we would automatically check the messages from social media or get distracted by some annoying phone calls while we are watching a
movie
 on the phone,which will possibly stop us from enjoying the
movie
.
That is
 to say,in order to gain a wonderful experience of seeing a film,
people
 are more likely to go to the
cinema
.
Secondly
,the unspoken role that the
cinema
 is playing
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is significant for
people
 who are in a relationship,it is a unique place for
people
 to date.So that means another function of
cinema
 is socialising.,Usually it is a place where it is almost dark, and
people
 can feel much more relaxed,which will help to strengthen their relationships,especially having an appointment with their crushes.Obviously,the meaning of the existence of cinemas is something below the surface. To sum up,not only providing a better experience of watching a
movie
 but
also
 helping us build a good relationship,seeing a film in the
cinema
 is still a good choice.
Submitted by 980907152 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: