IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

food can be produced much more cheaply today because of improved fertilizer and better machinery.Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and give your opinion.

#food #fertilizer #machinery
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The production of
food
Use synonyms
 has become cheaper due to the involvement of fertilizers and machinery or
equipment
Use synonyms
 that has been developed in the recent past. It is
also
Linking Words
 very important that a sufficient amount of
food
Use synonyms
 is produced due to the booming population in the world.
However
Linking Words
, in my ,opinion
this
Linking Words
 has advantages as well as disadvantages. The primary advantage of using imported or locally produced or manufactured manure and
equipment
Use synonyms
 is to achieve economies of scale.
This
Linking Words
 means producing a large volume at a lower operational cost. The increase in the construction output will lower the cost, which will help firms to offer these
food
Use synonyms
 items at a competitive price to the public. The
second
Linking Words
 benefit of using
equipment
Use synonyms
 and fertilizers will help the farmers or producers to enjoy a quality crop. Maintaining the quality of the
food
Use synonyms
 produced is very important as it will impact the well-being of the nation.
This
Linking Words
 could be clearly depicted in rural parts of Africa where children suffer from malnutrition due to the lack of quality
food
Use synonyms
 available.
However
Linking Words
, the use of fertilisers and machinery
also
Linking Words
 could have drawbacks. The chemicals used in manure could be harmful to the human body.
This
Linking Words
 could result in causing diseases
such
Linking Words
 as cancer in people due to the consumption of
such
Linking Words
 foods over a period of time. The use of
equipment
Use synonyms
 to automate the manufacturing process could cause employment.
This
Linking Words
 could be a disadvantage that needs to be managed well to have a balance of technology as well as human intervention. Unemployment would impact lower disposable income and standard of living. In my opinion, companies and countries should embrace technology and new products like manure to boost the manufacturing and condition of products with a less average cost ,
however
Linking Words
, drawbacks
such
Linking Words
 as unhealthy, harmful
food
Use synonyms
 and unemployment should be managed with proper measures by the involvement of the government.
Submitted by nayomi28 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: