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Band 4.5

A number of tertiary courses require students to undertake a period of unpaid work at art institution or organization as part of their programme. What are the advantages and disadvantages.

#courses #students #period #work #art #institution #organization #part #programme
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Some students in order to complete their degree need to do unpaid jobs at
art
 institutions. While there are some drawbacks associated with doing
such
 tasks, I believe its main benefits are more substantial. On the one hand, the
first
 drawback is that pupils’ fields may be different to
art
.
Thus
, doing artistic jobs would distract
students’ concentration
Change noun form
students
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 from their main path. It can result in lowering their grades. Negative results may have an adverse effect on students’ emotions.
Consequently
, they would be discouraged to continue their education. The
second
 one is that some youngsters may suffer from the lack of financial
supporter
Replace the word
support
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.
Therefore
, they need to earn money in order to buy their needs. Compelling them to work without
salary
Correct article usage
a salary
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 may lead them to a stressful situation which undoubtedly
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
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 their educational quality.
On the other hand
, a primary advantage of occupying
in
Change preposition
apply
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art related
Add a hyphen
art-related
show examples
 places is that students can benefit from
art
.
Art
 concludes
acting
Change preposition
with acting
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, painting and making sculptures which can improve students’ creativity. Being creative can help pupils to solve their problems in better ways.
In addition
, since most
these
Change preposition
of these
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 activities involve teamwork experiences, their interpersonal skills can be enhanced significantly. Learning how to interact with other people plays a vital role in students’ success. On balance, it is true that working free at
art
 organizations would seem disadvantageous under certain circumstances.
However
, in my view, its positive effects in terms of broadening students’ horizons in order to find effective solutions and teaching important life skills
override
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to override
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 its disadvantages.
Submitted by Alikhanimorez on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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