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Band 3.5

Lots of difficulties mankind will face up to in 2030. Do you agree or disagree?

#lots #difficulties #mankind #face
With
the
Correct article usage
apply
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time
the
Correct article usage
apply
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technology
have
Change the verb form
has
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 been advancing, but
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
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scientists predict humans may
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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face
plethora
Correct article usage
a plethora
show examples
 of problems
up
Change preposition
in
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 to
next
 eight years.
Personally
Add a comma
,Personally
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 I believe , human beings will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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face for
host
Add an article
a host
show examples
 of problems up to 2030. The ensure paragraphs of
this
 essay will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
reasons for
this
 issue.
The one
Correct article usage
One
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 of the
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 is the rising
of
Change preposition
apply
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population.
When
Change preposition
With when
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 rising population
people
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
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 have limited living areas.
Therefore
, there will
a
Remove the article
apply
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competition for land, water and food.
As
Change preposition
For
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
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instance,
currently
Add a comma
,currently
show examples
 china has
highest
Change the article
the highest
show examples
 number of
people
 and they have faced for lack of living areas.
However
 ,
this
 can be
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
show examples
 for a fight among
people
 in the future. The other factor is
environment
Replace the word
environmental
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 pollution.
Specially
Replace the word
Especially
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 with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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air pollution,
ozone
Add an article
the ozone
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 layer has been damaging.
This
 may
result
Add the preposition
inresult
fromresult
show examples
 health
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
such
a
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 skin carcinoma due to unwanted rays. The other reason is
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
 of oxygen due to damaging
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
ozone
Add an article
the ozone
show examples
 layer.
Therefore
 ,
people
 lost
also
 their breath in the future. When considering all of
above
Correct article usage
the above
show examples
 details, I think human beings may suffer
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of issues
such
limited
Change preposition
as limited
show examples
 living areas,
cansers
Correct your spelling
cancers
 and lack of
inferstructures
Correct your spelling
infrastructures
infrastructure
 in the future.
Submitted by chathuminiperera5 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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