Some people say that artists such as painters, writers and musicians affect our life more than scientists. TO what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your experience.

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Nowadays, Many individuals believe that
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artists
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artists'
artist's

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occupation
Fix the agreement mistake
occupations

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like writers and
musicains
Correct your spelling
musicians

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will be
imapct
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impact

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in their own
life
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Correct your spelling
compare
compared
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compare
compared

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campare
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compared
to experts. I totally disagree with
this
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notion,
i
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I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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will
giving
Wrong verb form
give

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reasons in the upcoming fourth paragraphs.
To begin
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with the disagreement, The
artists
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has
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have

The verb has does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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a
Correct article usage
apply

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good
work
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oppuntities because
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Linking Words
this
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in this

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occupation
workers
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will
be earn
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earn

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a good amount of money and modern public figure as well. To
expalin
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explain

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, Scientists and modern
artists
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such
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as painters
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

will be
great
Add an article
a great

The noun phrase great task seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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task even these
differnet
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different

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ways and
work
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enviroment
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environment

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need and clean because modern arts subject will be rising up in the
universties
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universities

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level.
For instance
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, The [BNC] British News Coast reveal that in their headline show that in Britain has most common and
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valuable
Correct your spelling
valuable

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valuble
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valuable
occupation is
artists
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

as
a musicians
Correct the article-noun agreement
a musician
musicians

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun musicians in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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.
Thus
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, The
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Use synonyms
artists
Change to a genitive case
artist's
artists'

It appears that the word artists should use the genitive case. Consider changing the noun.

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workers
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

has
Change the verb form
have

The singular verb has does not appear to agree with the plural subject workers. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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great
Add an article
a great

The noun phrase great beneficial impact seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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beneficial impact
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the nation's
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economy
Correct your spelling
economy

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ecnonmy
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economy
and
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Change the determiner
this worker
these workers

It appears that the singular demonstrative this is modifying the plural noun workers. Consider using a plural demonstrative or a singular noun instead.

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workers
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will be
succsseful
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successful

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in their
life
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. To commence with the agreement,
It's has
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It has

It appears that the form of the verb has does not work with 's in this sentence.

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impact
Correct article usage
an impact

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as well in their
life
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because their earn a chunk of money and bad habits will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb be appears to be unnecessary here.

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rise
Add an article
a rise

The noun phrase rise seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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in their own body
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
alchol
Correct your spelling
alcohol
alcoholic

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drink and drugs. To explicated, There
are
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is

The plural form of be are does not seem to agree with the singular subject various kind. Consider changing the verb form.

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various
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds

It seems that kind may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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of bad habitats in
painters
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painters'
painter's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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work
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

because their
work
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is very
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different
Correct your spelling
different

If you don’t want differnet to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

differnet
Correct your spelling
different
and hard
it's
Unnecessary verb
it

The verb 's appears to be unnecessary here.

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will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb be appears to be unnecessary here.

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impact
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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their
life
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
In
Correct your spelling
An

The word In doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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Australian news channel said that
in
Change preposition
apply

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Sydney has a big effect
for
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on

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drugs
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drug

Your sentence appears to use the incorrect form of drugs. Consider changing it to singular.

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dealers
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dealers'
dealer's

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smuggling
has
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb has appears to be unnecessary here.

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in common and most
of
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apply

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crimer
Correct your spelling
crime
crimes

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caught by police reveal many
has
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb has appears to be unnecessary here.

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belong
Change the verb form
belonged

It appears that the verb belong should be in the past participle form. Consider changing it.

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in
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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Use synonyms
Use synonyms
artists
Change noun form
artists'
artist's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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works as musicians.
Hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it's will be
losse
Correct article usage
a losse

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for their
Correct your spelling
reputation
Correct your spelling
reputation

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repuation
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reputation
in
community
Correct article usage
the community

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. In conclusion,
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

many
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
artists
Change noun form
artists'
artist's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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workers
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will be beneficial for their
Correct your spelling
society
Correct your spelling
society

If you don’t want scoiety to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

scoiety
Correct your spelling
society
and
public
Correct article usage
the public

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, these will
be lose
Change the verb form
lose

It appears that the form of the verb lose does not work with be in this sentence.

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their chance as
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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celebrities
Correct the article-noun agreement
celebrity

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun celebrities in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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in public because some
region's
Change the noun form
regions
region

It appears that the noun region's should not be in the possessive form. Consider changing it to the non-possessive singular or plural form.

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will
be reveal
Change the verb form
reveal

It appears that the form of the verb reveal does not work with be in this sentence.

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the truth.

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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