Governments investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Government should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement.

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It is believed by some that governments should spend more money on public services rather than amusements

such

as arts, music and theatre. I disagree with

this

statement and the reason will be explained in

this

essay. On one side of

this

argument, there are people who claim that amusements play a significant role in our life, by creating happiness and pleasuring a moment.

Also

, having a better quality of life. According to

this

, the studies of Hong Kong university show that many people who are going to attend the museum, having a glance at the exposition, are more delighted than people who do not, and they are more comfortable at work.

Thus

, the expenditure on amusements is essential for enjoyment and work.

On the other hand

, it is the duty of the cabinet to expend the funds for the public

such

as constructing more buildings, roads and transport, growing the cities and going any place without difficulty. To illustrate

this

, the reporting of Sri lang ka, the students are more convenient to transport to school.

This

is affecting their studies due to the lessening of time travelling, they have more time concentrating on the books.

Hence

, expanding on the public is

also

appropriate and reasonable for having a good life. To sum up, public service and arts, music and theatre have power over the community in many different ways.

Therefore

,I believe that the government's spending money should be equally on public services and arts, in terms of improving and developing lifestyle in their country.

Submitted by =) on Thu Sep 29 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Governments investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Government should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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