Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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I believe that

music

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has the power of beautifying life and bonding

people

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from different backgrounds. Most individuals tend to appreciate

songs

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with excellent

music

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even though they do not absorb the meaning of

songs

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that are written in foreign languages. Now I will express my belief in why

music

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can make

people

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open-minded, positive, and friendly.

First

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of all, it is naturally related to humans' sense of listening which is one of the main functions of a human being.

Furthermore

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this

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sense is always seeking to hear melodious voices or speeches,

thus

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this

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desire gives strength to

music

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and

songs

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to bond individuals listening to

music

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For instance

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, youth are likely to listen to hit

songs

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on billboard charts, after that if they want, they become real fans, meaning that they will be a part of particular fan clubs or communities, and age and cultural differences do not matter to them to unite.

Secondly

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music

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can positively influence humans’ mentality because of its melodious side,

in other words

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, it makes humans more relaxed and happy.

As a result

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this

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effect,

people

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will become more open-minded and they are able to communicate with those who have age differences and absorb other cultures’ values.

For example

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, anxious and stressed individuals can not build proper communication, as well as they are likely to be not curious about other

people

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or cultural things. In conclusion,

people

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are inadvertently bonded by their interests in

music

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not depending on differences in background.

Furthermore

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music

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can bring beneficial effects on our mental states, and

then

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it results in releasing negative emotions and helps us to become more talkative.

mgl2666Thu Sep 29 2022

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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