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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays, people have greater access to fast food. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #access #food #outweigh
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These days, citizens have huge disponibility to junk
food
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.
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Although
Althoug
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Although
 fast
food
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 is tasty and cheap, I
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believe
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belive
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believe
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 the disadvantages outweigh the advantages because it
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lead
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leads
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 to obesity. It
is well know
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is well known
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 that most
of
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
citizens feel interested in consuming fast
food
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 because it is so addictive by having too much salt, and
this
Linking Words
lead
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 to
overeat
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overeating
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
food
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 is so tasty that
people
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 do not know when to stop, and
this
Linking Words
lead
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 to
eat
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eating
show examples
 bigger
proportions
Replace the word
portions
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 of
food
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.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
yunk
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junk
food
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 is so cheap that
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anyone
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any one
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anyone
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 can have access to
this
Linking Words
food
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, and the size of
these
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this
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 type of
food
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 is huge for a very
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inexpensive
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unexpensive
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inexpensive
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 price.
This
Linking Words
 cause
that
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apply
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many families opt to visit places
such
Linking Words
 as
MacDonalds
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MacDonald
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 or Carls juniors.
For Instance
Linking Words
, In The
united
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United
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 States,
the
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apply
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obesity in children is common
in
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
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whole country because companies that sell
yunk
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junk
food
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 give away gumble size
package
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packages
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 of
food
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 for less than five dollars.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 sounds tempting, I believe is preferable to measure the portion of
food
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 given to
people
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, and avoid eating too much salty and unhealthy
food
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. It is essential that society know how greasy
food
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affect
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affects
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 their health
that
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and that
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this
Linking Words
 might
lead
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 to chronic diseases. Obesity is
number
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the number
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 one disease among the population in the United States because
people
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 usually tend to overeat.
Moreover
Linking Words
, being obese is not just
matter
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a matter
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 of appearance
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because
becasue
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because
this
Linking Words
lead
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 to
suffer
Wrong verb form
suffering
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 from diseases
such
Linking Words
 as high cholesterol, liver
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disease
diease
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disease
, and diabetes type two.
Although
Linking Words
,
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apply
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 it is
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acceptable
aceptable
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acceptable
 to eat greasy
food
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 once a month because it is so tasty,
this
Linking Words
 should not be a habit for our community. To explain
further
Linking Words
, the
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vast
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bast
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vast
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 majority of Hispanics living in The United States suffer from Diabetes because they ignore
to eat
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eating
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 small portions, and tend to eat too much greasy
food
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,
so
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apply
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this
Linking Words
lead
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 to
chonic
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chronic
 disease. I believe it is important to prevent illnesses coming
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from
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form
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from
show examples
 eating too much and
people
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 need to choose healthy choices when it comes to
eat
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eating
show examples
. To conclude,
although
Linking Words
yunk
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junk
food
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 is tasty and
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inexpensive
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unexpensive
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inexpensive
show examples
 to acquire, it is preferable to be aware
about
Change the preposition
of
show examples
 all the diseases a person can suffer
for
Change preposition
from
show examples
 eating unhealthy. For these
reasons
Add a comma
,reasons
show examples
 the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.
Submitted by cuevas14dic on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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