Everyone should stay at school until 18. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Owing to the burgeoning competition Era
parents
want
their
Replace the word
they're
they are
show examples
to
children
focus on academic studies. It is believed by some people that
students
should be studied in
school
till 18 years old. I completely agree with
this
statement and in the subsequent fragments. I will discuss why. Irrefutably, there are a plethora of grounds why I agree with
this
statement but the vital two are enhancing a creative mindset and learning
time
management. To commence with the former view, presently many schools give project work which is helping
students
to think creatively and productively.
This
is because, many
parents
like to stay their
children
in
school
because they can learn new things like painting, puzzle games, communication skills and so on;
consequently
, adults are becoming smart and they learn quickly.
For example
, if schools had not
have
Change the verb form
had
show examples
smart classed rooms,
then
students
would not have worked smartly and
better
Add a missing verb
had better
show examples
skills.
Furthermore
, schools not only teach core subjects but
also
give opportunities for extracurricular activities.
Therefore
,
students
can become smart and skilled people.
Moreover
, many organizations give priority to rules and regulations which helps pupils become
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
self-discipline
Replace the word
self-disciplined
show examples
as well as better
time
management.
Firstly
, both
parents
work 9 to 5 jobs and they have no
time
for their
children
.
This
is the reason,
parents
want to stay long hours in
school
and they can attend day boarding classes so that
children
can learn
time
management and discipline.
For instance
, according to the Hindu newspaper, presently youngsters are becoming strict with rules and serious about their dreams. Thereby, many
children
grab study quickly and earn early stages.
Secondly
, adults who learn discipline in
school
life. They are more focused and dedicated to their studies rather than
procrastination
Replace the word
procrastinate
show examples
. To recapitulate, many people think that
children
should study in
school
at 18 age but if
children
spent a long
time
in
school
,
then
they will be focused on their career and it will give fruitful results.
Submitted by surjeet_17 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Peer pressure
  • Desensitize
  • Aggressive behavior
  • Neglect
  • Abuse
  • Supervision
  • Anti-bullying measures
  • Societal norms
  • Stereotypes
  • Dominance
  • Cyberbullying
  • Anonymity
  • Digital devices
  • Enforcement
  • Cultural tolerance
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