Some people say that the government should not put money on building theatres and sports stadiums. They should spend more money on medical care and education. Do you agree or disagree?
There is no doubt that states should provide money for establishing certain art and
sports
-related facilities as well as
maintaining their social systems; likewise
, healthcare and curriculum. While
some argue that the source that was provided by authorities for hospital and college system should be more, instead
of this
view, I believe we should share more dollars for art and sports
centres. In this
essay, I will explain my opinion.
Firstly
, some individuals need to receive medical services. Due to
obesity, sedimental
lifestyle, excessive sugar consumption, trans-fat intake ,and exposure to chemical toxins, we are likely to get sick more than ever. Correct word choice
sedentary
Therefore
, the citizens of any country are facing some conditions which cause an increase in hospital usage and money that spends
on that service. Wrong verb form
is spent
Thus
, the nation's taxes have been spent for
an unsustainable system. Change preposition
on
Moreover
, In this
day, as
an individual, I think our leaders should not pay for the education system, because, parents have shared already Correct word choice
and, as
with
their pupils.
Correct pronoun usage
it with
In contrast
, governments have to build more sports
centres and theatres for the public's sake. If the number of facilities that conduct physical exercises and stage plays increases, the knowledge level of the public will improve. Additionally
, according to
history researcher Tobias Forge: since world-war-two
Germany has designed different kinds of theatres. Correct your spelling
World War Two,
Hence
, their economy surged and reached its peak by 2002. In my point of view, governments can encourage their people to be more decent and productive through sports
stadiums. Consequently
, more investment in these places would be very beneficial.
To sum up
, presidents are able to invest taxes on numerous aspects, like health, education, and art. Some believe that they suppose
to give more money to health and school-based infrastructures, Wrong verb form
are supposed
however
, If I were an authority, I would make more theatres and sports
areas.Submitted by nuri-akbas on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion clearly present the main points and provide a strong thesis statement. This will help to improve the overall coherence of the essay.
task achievement
Make sure to address all parts of the prompt and provide a clear stance on the issue. Provide specific and relevant examples to support your argument.