Today children spend more time watching TV. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?

In nowadays
Change preposition
Nowadays
show examples
youngsters
spend most
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
free
time
watching
TV
channels. I believe that
this
statement
iare
Correct your spelling
are
not
Change the verb form
does not
did not
show examples
outweigh the demerits.
Firstly
,
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
do not do personal growth. Every year, lots of schoolgoers after
school
watch YouTube or Netflix. Most of them watch materials that do not develop
Correct your spelling
themselves
theirselves
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
. In spite
Correct your spelling
of
ot
Correct your spelling
of
the fact that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they do not
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
progress, they become more stupid.
Reaserch
Correct your spelling
Research
shows, that children who watch
tv
instead
of
hang
Change the verb form
hanging
show examples
out with peers get worst grades than their friends that go out together and
youngsters
that spend most
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
time
on tb
have
Add the particle
to have
show examples
predisposition
Change the article
the predisposition
show examples
to distract
Correct your spelling
themselves
theirselves
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
.
Secondly
,
Correct your spelling
children
children's
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
have less
time
.
In other words
,
youngsters
after
school
should do homework,
also
Correct word choice
and also
show examples
do housework like taking
rubbish
Add an article
the rubbish
show examples
out or vacuuming.
Correct your spelling
Instead
Insted
Correct your spelling
Instead
of doing their duty, they watch
tv
and waste their free
time
on
such
things.
For example
, my younger brother after
school
watch
Correct subject-verb agreement
watches
show examples
lots of YouTube and
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
not spend
time
on productive things;
moreover
Add a comma
,moreover
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
have to do his
Correct your spelling
housework
house works
houseworks
Correct your spelling
housework
.
On the other hand
, there is one major argument
on
Change preposition
about
show examples
watching
TV
. In
spote
Correct your spelling
spite
of the
fact
Add a comma
,fact
show examples
I said on
first
demerits that youngster
waste
Change the verb form
wastes
show examples
their
time
. It may be good for them if they watch productive
chanells
Correct your spelling
channels
or news.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
I used to watch math lessons
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because I didn't have knowledge but with
time
I got better and better grades. In conclusion, watching
tv
by
youngsters
is good for
develop
Change the verb form
developing
show examples
Correct your spelling
themselves
theirselves
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
, but more of them spend their free
time
and it may cause addiction and children can have
Correct your spelling
problems
proplems
Correct your spelling
problems
with
school
Add an article
the school
show examples
.
Submitted by bandrowskaagnieszka1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: