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Writing Samples
Band 4

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more diadvantages?

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #situation #diadvantages
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Nowadays one of the widely discussed issues is overworked
people
Use synonyms
 are working a lot in their offices and spending less
time
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 on their hobbies. It's undeniable that human performance has become an integral part of our life.
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However
Add a comma
,However
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 there is no absolute agreement as some
people
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 find
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
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 beneficial, while others consider everything associated with
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
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negatively
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negative
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. In
this
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essay
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,essay
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 I will examine both pros and cons of
this
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 controversial issue. There are a number of significant benefits of some companies
extend
Wrong verb form
extending
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 their overall performance to earn
bonuces
Correct your spelling
bonuses
 and incentives.
For example
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, in software companies, employees often spend most of their
time
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 at work meeting goals and closing contracts.
This
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 helps them in getting higher positions.
This
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 will surely guarantee promotion or promotion. Turning to the other side of the argument, working long has several downsides given the hectic work schedule
people
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 do not spare much
time
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 for their hobbies or have very little
time
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 for them. Another major disadvantage is
people
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 lose health
as a result
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 of overwork. According to the latest statistics, almost all working
people
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 are bothered by health problems.
In addition
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, the lack of
time
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 to relax and enjoy has a negative effect on a person's mental health. It causes stress. Having weighed everything mentioned up I can come to
a
Correct article usage
the
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 conclusion that it is a personal choice to make
time
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 for fun activities or to work long hours. But I believe that
people
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 should take
time
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 for themselves. So I think there are more
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
diadvantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
 than advantages.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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